In which a girl who hides behind baggy sweaters and a fake smile is forced to learn that 'perfection' doesn't come easily, and being skinny isn't always worth the pain. "she cried herself to sleep that night, because deep down she knew that no matter how many meals she skipped and how much exercise she did, Olivia would never be skinny." [disorder diaries, 2014 backseatmuke] tw :: eating disorders, major character death

This is my story of abuse, neglect, bullying, and the effect it had on me. That effect was mental illness, an eating disorder, and BPD. Eating disorders and self harm have been an addiction for me since i was around 12 or 13. I went through a few really bad things in my life and this is my story. *All names, including my own have been changed. **Edana is my pseudonym for everything related to me on the internet. As Edana is the name I give to the little voice in my head, the one who tells me not to eat, the one who tells me I'm worthless and ugly. She wants perfection, she wants me to be perfect.

Eli Wyatt Walker is the name. Well, my boy name anyway. This is my story (diary) that I've keep to record my feelings since I really don't have anyone I consider super close that I would tell them anyway so what better way to share my feelings than to write them down? I started out fat and now I turned super skinny because anorexia and bulimia is a hard thing to handle... I worry some people... And myself... Because no one wants a fat person... No one wants a stick figure... What does someone one out of me? What do I have to change to get someone to love me? Find out with me because honestly, I have no idea either. ****THIS IS A WORK OF FICTION****