Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

Can a natural killer learn to be human again? Regan's unique talent for murder makes her a perfect assassin. After a lethal encounter leaves her broken body washed up on a beach, she finds herself adopted by a group of teenage bodyguards. She doesn't intend to stay for long, but soon Regan finds herself faced with a choice: become a hero or stay a villain? *** The boy played with the flat brim of the cap in his hands and looked around the room. He sat back in his chair, trying to look casual, but the heel of his hi-top sneaker drummed rapidly on the concrete floor. Regan sat opposite him with her legs crossed and her hands folded on her tartan skirt. She watched him without a word and brushed a strand of blue-dyed hair behind her ear. Somehow this seemed to unsettle him more. 'Calm down,' she said. 'It's just murder.' *** Author's Note: Darkness Girl: Trickster God is represented by Louise Fury from The Bent Agency. P.S. The epic cover was made by Paul Kopetko (you can stalk him at paulkopetko.com). Enjoy!

An original and unique Paranormal Romance Mystery that will leave you on the edge of your seat and guessing until the end! When nineteen-year-old Vanessa Hunter falls to her death, she realizes her life as she knows it, is over. But when Death strikes a bargain with her in exchange for her immortal soul, she takes the ultimate gamble and becomes a Death Angel: gifted with the powers of Death and responsible for finding and harvesting lost souls on earth. Now Vanessa has to perform Death's dirty deeds, forced to deal with all sorts of unimaginable evils: Vampires, Demons from Hell, and Hedge Fund Managers. Not to mention this girl Rina, with special powers, who is absolutely obsessed with taking down the new Death Angel. On top of all that, Vanessa still has to solve the riddle to her murder; a riddle that points back to her fiance, Daniel Ashcroft. Thrust into this strange new world, Vanessa finds her emotions in turmoil. She still loves Daniel with all her heart, but now finds herself strangely drawn to Death; a being who is at once mysterious, infuriating, and madly attractive. But things are not at all what they seem, and there are many things that Vanessa needs to uncover, unsettling things about her former life, her family's money, and Death, her newfound "savior" who doesn't always seem to be on her side. Can Vanessa tell friend from foe, and solve the riddle of her murder to find out if the man she's loved all along, was truly her lover? Or her greatest enemy? Copyright © 2015 Michael Limjoco

Chosen when a child, Lady Joselyn is trained to be a ruthless killer. She is destined to be the English king's assassin and protector. Only he and the guild master are supposed to know. It's a life and death secret that must be kept. For an assassin survival is precarious. Life is something you simply cannot take for granted because the next day is never granted. Despite her privileged upbringing, Joselyn quickly learned how to survive on her own and to never trust a soul while following the Guild without question. Upon her return to England, a murderous plot against King Cassiush is discovered. Joselyn is shocked when she finds out who the fiend is. She's even more shocked when the King proposes marriage, a lot. An assassin has never married her king before. The last one who fell in love had her tongue ripped out and was burned alive. Letting her emotions cloud her judgment, Joselynfalls for Cassius and agrees to the marriage, jeopardizing not only his life but her own. Disobeying the Guild means death. Now she must figure out how to keep them both alive and not piles of smoldering ash.

Evelyn is the first daughter born to an assassin. Her life was never meant to be and the Guild will do anything to end it. Years after her mother, Queen Joselyn, fought for her own freedom and the man she loves, Princess Evelyn must follow in her footsteps. As strange things occur around her, and the bodies pile up, the spoiled young princess must come to terms with who her mother was and who she is now. It's her time to take up the sword and protect those she loves.