once upon a time there was a hyper disney fangirl who called her friend, only to end up talking to a cynical world famous singer named lewis instead. rankings: short story 1 humor 1

[Highest Ranks: #1 in hotline, and #11 in Short story] "Do you really want to know my name" " Yes tell me" " DO YOU REALLY REALLY WANT TO KNOW?" "YESS" " YOU REALLY REALLY REALLY WANT TO KNOW!" " YESS TELL ME GODDAMMIT!" " MY NAME IS..." " WHAT?" " THE NAMES BOND, JAMES BOND" --- Sitting around in an office chair working part time wasn't really Lucys cup of tea and being home alone wasn't really the same either for Mark when you have an idiot for a roommate, but who knew things would get a little livelier when you mix: One fateful phone call Two amazingly sarcastic dorks And a whole lot of puns. You might just want to buckle up your seatbelts for the sarcastic duo coming your way.

It's the time of the year again - and it's definitely going to be a special one when the entire Perfect series crew gather to celebrate Christmas this year at Blaire and Jax's mansion. Perfect Christmas includes characters from the second book PERFECT ADDICTION, which is now a film, as well as PERFECT REDEMPTION. * The first edition to this Christmas series (Perfect Christmas 2015 edition) is in the Perfect Series Extras book *

❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer reviews? How many stars out of five?❞ ❝What are yo- oh my god, I'm going to fucking kill Marie.❞ (alternatively called: a lot of people shit with pens) written in dialogue // cover by xhemmingshugsx

Perfect Ruin is now published as a Paperback, and E-book with W by Wattpad Books! As a Wattpad reader, you can access the Wattpad Original Edition here Perfect Ruin is the THIRD book in the Perfect series and a prequel for PERFECT ADDICTION, which is now a film. ***** He wanted to be her savior. But ultimately, she became his ruin.

"You've reached Westerden Ski Lodge, how may I be of assistance?" "Hey, can I rent some snow boots and skis? Maybe even a girlfriend, if you've got any in stock." "Awesome, do you want to order a life along with that? The gift wrapping's free of charge." "I'll take what I can get." - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Short Story #5 (13/02/17) © 2016 evethespy. All Rights Reserved.

Connecting to Video Chat... "Hi!" "Oh. Oh my god. Oh god." "What?" "I thought you were a boy." --- all characters and situations in "i thought you were a boy" are works of fiction. highest rankings: #2 in Short Story (07/15/17) #1 in "girlxgirl" (06/11/17) #1 in "freethelgbt" (09/06/17) #1 in LGBT+ (06/15/17) #1 in "shortstorycollection" (09/30/18) #22 in "story" (10/06/18)

[Highest rank so far: #46 in short story] "It didn't matter that I was getting all A's on my report card. It didn't matter that I could read a book in less than two days. It didn't matter that I could perfect oil painting techniques. It didn't matter that I had a healthy diet and tried my best to exercise. None of it mattered. Simply because I had one unwanted characteristic called fat." *** This is one girl's story. From her point of view. No exaggerations, no extra, no lies, no holding back this time. When she looks in the mirror she sees nothing but her failure. She hears nothing but the ear shattering sound of opinions from everyone. Everything is targeted to her. Everything is wrong with her. WARNING: This story contains a view of the mind of one insecure female. This focuses on body image and shaming and touches upon topics of eating disorders. (cover picture is not mine, but belongs to the respective owner.)

"Hello?" "Um, hey?" "Wait, you don't sound like my Aunt Kathy." "Unless I was miraculously converted into a member of the opposite gender and somehow related to whoever is on the other side of this call, then yeah. I'm not your Aunt Kathy." "Oh, shiitake mushrooms." - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Short Story #1 (19/04/18) 2016 Fiction Awards Finalist © 2015 evethespy. All Rights Reserved.

❝ Part of being a feminist is not just bringing the struggles of the women to the fore front but also confronting the issues of the male in this modern century despite what everyone says or believes ❞ #ThePeopleOfSociety #BreakStereotypes