**2016 WATTYS WINNER FOR VISUAL STORYTELLING** Letting her appearance fall to the wayside and desperate to find a reason for her life, Marilyn sits half naked in an Urgent Care examination room with a mysterious skin itch. If she can survive the humiliation of being treated by a sexy male nurse while unraveling the hidden drama woven throughout the hospital staff, Marilyn might leave the hospital cured far below the surface of her skin. NURSE McSEXY is a hilariously enhanced true story (with a healthy dose of fiction) about my mortifying experience involving an allergic reaction, Urgent Care and a sexy male nurse. It was an evening in which one of my greatest fears was encountered--only to reveal my better self on the other side of humiliation. This humorous tale is definitely worth calling in sick for! TO CLARIFY: Despite the title, this is not a tale about a hot and sweaty romance. I mean--I wish it was since it's based on a true story. Unfortunately (depending on how you look at it), my life is a lot more on the belly laughing side of the spectrum than the steaming up mirrors side. Just saying.

♛Wattpad Featured Story♛ The retelling of Cinderella through the eyes of the (cynical and perverted) pumpkin that became the carriage. ▶There is strong language in this story.◀

⇝Featured on Wattpad @humor profile⇜ Death is stuck in an odd conversation with its latest reap from Earth, and Death is not backing down. Cover by @wannabea-

I'm pretty extraordinary (read: absolutely normal) for an average guy named Patrick- Patrick Kraker, and before you ask, no, I do not want a cracker; neither does Polly. Polly's sick of crackers. a) My summer job may or may not involve spray painting myself completely silver and standing motionless in the park. Of course not. b) I also may or may not be investigating and communicating with a homeless guy who is (possibly): one, not actually homeless and two, part of a cult of (probably) bloodthirsty satanic worshippers. *** Copyright © 2015 by unfurled All rights reserved #34 Humour Featured as of 28/04/16

*****WATTYS 2015 WINNER!***** WATTPAD STAFF PICK (9/7/15) In the end, the robots win. But you already knew that. "Everyone Died + My iPhone Stopped Working" is a collection of short interviews with some of the survivors. People who have tremendous insight into the rise of Artificially Intelligent machines or, more often, don't. Why did the robots rise up? What did they want? Why couldn't they be stopped? Can they be stopped now? Is humanity doomed? And what the f--k is going on with the squirrels? You will get the answers to all of these questions. Or some of these questions. Or none of these questions. We'll see. I will be updating this once a week until I run out of stuff that I find funny. Then I'm done. Cover art courtesy of the hilarious and ridiculously talented Dave Pressler. (http://www.davepresslerart.com)

❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer reviews? How many stars out of five?❞ ❝What are yo- oh my god, I'm going to fucking kill Marie.❞ (alternatively called: a lot of people shit with pens) written in dialogue // cover by xhemmingshugsx

I found this book. It's for dead people. Yeah. I'm a little worried. A short story about what really happens when you die. A Wattpad 'Featured List' story and winner of the 'HQ Love Award' in the 2014 Wattys! I hope you enjoy it! If you do, please check out my new short story collection for Kindle, 'The Good Death Guide and Other Tales', featuring extra passages from the Good Death Guide! http://www.amazon.com/Good-Death-Guide-Other-Tales-ebook/dp/B00SPRQY4Q

--Watty winner-- In Victorian London, monster hunting isn't just a job, it's a way of life. Freddie Westman, a reporter for a paranormal magazine, is one of the best in the business, but now it's personal. His childhood friend, Jim Penderry, has disappeared, and the signs point to sinister forces from beyond the grave. If Westman wants to save Jim, he'll have to face his worst fear. No, not fighting a demon with only a cake to hand. Something far more daunting. Sceptical Sophie Penderry doesn't solve mysteries or go on adventures. She's more at home in the library with her nose in The Botanist's Guide to Plants and Fungi. But she puts the science books away to help Westman find her missing brother, whether he likes it or not. Which he really doesn't. Westman is a loner, reluctant to lead anyone into danger. According to him, the supernatural is not just the stuff of folklore and children's nightmares, and a world of black magic awaits them. Now Westman must decide if he should push Sophie away for her own safety, or take a leap of faith and accept an offer of help and friendship. Either way, time is running out to find Jim, and worse still, they may not make it back in time for tea and biscuits. ~Featured story (Sep 2014 - Aug 2017) ~Selected by R.L. Stine's 'Slappy' (Goosebumps Movie's sponsored reading list) ~Winner of the Wattys 2014 HQ Love Award

Život sedamnaestogodišnje Jannat Mary Elgort se mijenja nakon što je roditelji upisuju na Akademiju gospođice Smithson za nadarene mlade, tajanstveno sveučilište u kojemu mladi s istaknutim sposobnostima uče kako ih primjenjivati i unaprijeđivati. Uskoro nakon Jannatina dolaska na Akademiju, jedna od njezinih suučenica umire tragičnom, ali vrlo čudnom smrću, te Jannat počinje sumnjati da Akademija nije mjesto kakvo su njoj i ostalim običnim građanima opisivali.