'I'm not like that. I can't be like that. I can't like him. I don't like him. The Bible says it's wrong. He's my best friend. He'd understand.' Ever wanted to doubt your morality or sanity? This is a good place to start. Severe Trigger Warnings: vulgar language, graphic imagery, depression/mental illness, health problems/illness, self harm, mentions of suicide, unhealthy relationships, disturbing situations, smut/kink, maybe some tears. I will update this list as the story progresses. If it exists elsewhere in this fandom, it will probably be in here. I am writing this story to complete a challenge given to me by my friend, FieryZorua (outlined below). If you hate it, blame her. This thing is longer than a Harry Potter book (over 700 pages and more than 250,000 words) and the chapters might actually crash mobile devices. Challenge Information: Must break your current writing record (120,000 words or 350 pages for me for stories that aren't one-shots); must include as many overused plot lines and character stereotypes as possible (it's a giant parody of everyone else's stories); must be one continuous story line that is easy to follow; all facts were either gathered in a single 20-minute Google search period performed before the story was outlined, or they have to be made up on the spot. Only dialect/spelling/pronunciation/phrases and recent events (post-2016) can be looked up after the research period is over. I speak no truth - only nonsense.

Mat always felt alone. At least not with Rob. Can Rob break the walls the Mat has protected so much or is there someone else?