A story, a joke, a piece forever encarved into the threads of history.

"You're an asshole," I blurted. "You're such an asshole that your actual asshole is jealous." Silence. What the hell did I just say? Out of all the insults, I choose one that makes the least sense? Damn it, why couldn't I just have been born normal... Wait, never mind. Psh, screw sanity. "Can we keep her?" Tyler suddenly says, bouncing on his tippy toes. "Please, Keith? Can we keep her? Huh, huh, huh?" What am I, a pet? "Keith" whipped his head towards Tyler so fast I could've sworn I heard a crack. "Keep her?" he echoed. "No, Tyler, we can not keep her." Thank you. "She's utterly useless to us, and you want to keep her?" I gasped, placing a hand over my chest. Useless? Damn, these people are rude as hell. "But," Tyler whined, walking over to me. I tensed all over when he squished my cheeks together. "Look at how adorable she is. She's just so innocent... you'd never suspect anything bad from her." Keith expression changed, to one I knew very well from my experiences with Val. Lightbulb. "Tyler, you are a genius," Keith says. Tyler's hands stop squishing my cheeks. "I am?" "He is?!" everyone else says. Keith doesn't reply, just keeps on grinning wickedly. And suddenly I have a feeling that I am not gonna make it out of here alive. - WARNING: VERY CRINGE WORTHY MATERIAL NOW AVAILABLE TO PURCHASE http://www.lulu.com/shop/angel-zenith/the-gangleader-kidnapped-me/paperback/product-23087208.html Highest Rank: #1 in Humor April 19, 2015 CoAuthor: DreamCreature

|| Highest Rank - #1 in Teen Fiction || Ever broken into Disney World at three in the morning? Ever pranked the police and almost gotten arrested for it? Ever played paintball at the park in nothing but your underwear? Maya hasn't. But she is about to... Dylan Thompson is the most popular guy in the school and is seeking revenge after Maya slapped him for being a 'pervert'. What would you do if you were Maya? Move to Mexico and change your name to Rico and then proceed to move into an apartment with a goat owner named Pablo, obviously. What does Maya do? She doesn't run, instead she kicks him where the sun don't shine and slaps him again. Time for revenge nerd. --- Cover by the best human @1Dgurlwrites WARNING: Contains mild language & may cause many eyes rolls, fangirl moments and tears. [COMPLETED] Copyright © by Laylaa Khan

Text messages between anonymous and Winter. [COMPLETED] #8 - 28/2/16 (short story) #14 - 22/2/16 (short story)

Conversations between Daisy and Cody. (spin off to Texts) [COMPLETED] -you don't have to read Texts first to understand this book but there are some spoilers in here for Texts- --- feel free to pm me if you'd like to translate this book!

"Quick Clean Laundry! When it's dirty we make it clean, this is Melissa speaking." "uh...." "Hello?.." "I asked a cute girl her number and this is what she gave me" #3 in Short Story [8/1/16] Book One From Texts and Calls Series © Copyrights Reserved

❝Hello, this is the Starb-❞ ❝HEEELP ME!! PLEASE! THERE'S A MURDERER IN MY HOUSE!❞ ❝OH SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!! WHAT DO I DO?! THIS IS STARBUCKS, NOT FREAKING 911. WAIT, HOLD ON. TRY TO KEEP YOURSELF ALIVE, I'LL CALL 911!! STAY CALM. IT'S GOING TO BE O- ❞ ❝Wait...did you just say Starbucks?❞ ❝Um...yeah?❞ ❝They have a hotline?❞ ---- fun conversations between two Potterheads over the Starbucks hotline. [highest rank: #6 in short story] [highest rank: #2 in short story 5/6/17]

In our school.... You shouldn't trust anyone.... You trust only yourself. You have to fake everything... Just to be safe. You have to conceal all your feelings... so that you wouldn't be fooled. You have to fool everyone... You have to be good in the outside... and bad in the inside... Unusual thing happen.. Are you ready to die? 'Cause we were ready along time ago... WELCOME TO HELL...