Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

Picture this: You enter the mall with your friends. As you're making your way to buy a strawberry smoothie, you notice something more delicious walking right towards you. As he comes closer, he gives you a heart stopping smirk then takes you by surprise. He pulls you into a headlock, jabs a gun in your temple, then runs away with you. As I uncover why this mysterious model kidnapped me, I find myself tackling, punching, hugging, and watching Disney movies with him. Call me reckless, but something about this troubled kidnapper is quite intriguing yet heartbreaking. Find out if I, Skylar Scrowbar, end up dead in a ditch somewhere, or end up helplessly falling in love with my sexy kidnapper.

Luna has problems. Bigger problems than simply being a werewolf. She ran away from her Pack, making her a rogue - something unheard of. Females are rare, and viciously protected, so why would she leave the safety of Pack life to fend for herself? Well, Luna has secrets. Ones that could destroy her. So what happens when she tries to start over, in a new school, only to find it overrun by an enemy pack? Well she has a plan: lay low and get by unnoticed. Unfortunately nothing is ever as easy as it should be when it comes to Luna. Throw in an assassin frenemy who has secrets of his own and may or may not want to kill her himself, a boy on the brink of losing control, and a mischievous one-of-a-kind pet, and Luna might just be in over her head. I do not own the cover. All rights go to the owner.*