I can't believe that I'm doing another one of these. When does it end?? Well, here are some more completely screwed-up, completely true things I've heard people say... Feel free to contribute chapters :) *There is cussing so guard your baby eyes* [#145 in Humor as of 5/10/18]

Screw you, Wattpad, this book DOES belong in the humor category. // All of these quotes are (regrettably) 100% true... // Sorry for the unreadable cover - Wattpad Covers FAILED ME. // This is the third book in the series, but don't feel obligated to read the first two by any means (although they're pretty hilarious if I do say so myself). // The fourth book is now up! // I also have a "Weird Things I Heard in Life" series if you wanna check that out! // *THERE WILL PROBABLY BE CUSSING IN THIS BOOK. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED* // [#65 in Humor as of 2/8/18]

Sixteen-year-old Sage Greene was locked in a maximum-security asylum for the criminally insane after murdering nearly 200 civilians. It isn't her, though - it's the voices. There are two sides to Sage: the normal, self-conscious teenager, and the Voice lurking inside her head, the one that forced her to strike out and kill. Now, both parts of Sage are being sent into space, destined for a new rehabilitation program upon Mars, with a group of the most dangerous teenagers in America. Before they can reach the red planet, however, they are abducted by a strange alien race and taken away from their spaceship and everything they have ever known to compete in a sadistic set of physical and mental tests nicknamed the Trials. And so far, nobody has survived the Trials. * {Highest ranking: #5 in science fiction as of 9/3/17} [Comment threads contain spoilers at random. You have been warned.] WARNING This is a very dark book that only spirals further down. Murder is discussed and there are slightly graphic scenes.

Iris Ash was the result of black magic. Black magic, and a woman's desire for a child. That woman is long dead. Now, Iris fights for the Night Plague, a cult run completely by women who specialize in murdering evil, corrupted men. Her only true friend is Sara, a woman who joined the cult five years ago after being badly abused. Sara is the only person that Iris has ever truly trusted or relied on. So when Sara is kidnapped, Iris is understandably infuriated. The half-demon, half-angel woman launches into a quest to find Sara before it is too late, discovering secrets about herself and her heritage along the way, along with the important fact that not all is how it seems. [#974 in Action as of November 13) (Updates on Sundays) [Cover credits to @HayleyAutumns]

This is just a really weird book about really weird stuff. This is the stupid yet (sometimes) funny crap I actually hear in school. The second book is now published, as is "Weird Things I Heard in Life!" I'm always looking for your own contributions via DMs as to what weird stuff YOU hear! (NOTE: the book gets funnier as it goes on. The first few chapters are quite rubbish. Feel free to skip ahead to the good stuff or power through!) [Highest ranking: #301 in Humor as of 10/4/18]

This is the second book in the "Weird Things" series, so make sure to check out the first one! Basically just a collection of the stupid(ly funny) things I hear at school. For the best morsels of my life outside of school, read "Weird Things I Heard in Life." Contributions are welcome! DM me with your funny story and I'll give you credit for it. {Highest Ranking: #250 in Humor as of 9/28/17}

These are all completely real, completely screwed-up things I hear in my day to day life...please send help. / There is cussing toward the middle to the end, so guard your innocent eyes. [Highest Ranking #167 in Humor as of 9/7/17]

All the stupid(ly funny) stuff I hear outside of school. Trust me, you'll be questioning my sanity after this. The second book is available on my profile! To read the best bits from my school days, check out "Weird Things I Heard in School" 1 & 2! {Highest ranking: #484 in Humor as of 6/19/17}