||book 1 of the akotw trilogy|| Hate, abuse, and suffering. That is the reality for 17 year old Channing Darly. She endures the abuse delivered by her stepfather, while also trying to protect her oblivious mother. In order to deal with the physical, emotional, and sexual abuse, she often finds herself turning to the blade, and taking her frustrations out on her own delicate flesh. When Channing gets the chance to meet the boys of One Direction at a local signing, she's eager and nervous to share her letters that's she's written to Niall over the past year. They develop a bond that no one seems able to explain; Channing leaves Niall with a stack of her letters, and Niall leaves Channing with the promise that he'll read them, as well as his leather bracelet to remind her that someone is thinking about her. Someone cares. Little does Channing know, that once she let's Niall into her mind and soul through her letters, he'll stop at nothing to mend her broken past. Even when she resists his advances, he lovingly kicks the walls down she's built around her heart; one kiss, one touch, and three little words at a time. They may not have known each other for long... but all they know for sure is that everything has changed... and it started with a kiss on the wrist. ||WARNING|| This story will contain sexual content, as well as many forms of abuse, including: drugs, verbal/physical/sexual abuse, and self harm. It is rated R and not intended for individuals who are underage or lack the maturity to understand such mature concepts. Also, later on, you will find some chapters have been marked as private by Wattpad because of inappropriate content-- please be sure to follow me so that you don't have any problems viewing these chapters. Feel free to watch the trailer in the media section if you need a more visual explanation as to what this story contains. <3 Mandy © 2012

||book 2 of the akotw trilogy|| For now, things are going perfect for Channing and Niall... but things never stay perfect for long - especially when some of Channing's biggest demons of her past aren' t willing to give up on dragging her back to Hell. When monsters from her past resurface, Niall learns that Jeff has some friends in high places. A kidnapping, more abuse, and more suffering awaits them-- not to mention the psychological damaging and emotionally draining flashbacks that Channing begins to suffer every time Niall and her attempt to be intimate. What will happen to the friendship shared between Louis, Harry, and Jetta after one night they manage to take things a bit too far? Even though both boys manage to hold a piece of her heart, in the end she will have to choose one... or will she? Will her possible inability to choose destroy their friendships entirely? Or will it bring them closer than they've ever been...?

I remember nine years ago, when I was a bright eyed 16 year old X-Factor hopeful... I'd try to picture what my life could look like if I ever made it big. I saw myself recording albums, selling out arenas, and working with some of the biggest artists in the world. And it's true... I did do those things... all of those things and more. I never imagined I'd be a 25 year old alcoholic with a different woman in my bed every night. I never thought I'd be someone so full of hate and anger that I could no longer find joy in anything besides meaningless sex, alcohol and drugs. I never knew I'd sink so low where I could be so cruel and disrespectful toward those who were only trying to help me. But then again, I also didn't think I'd be the last remaining member of One Direction either. People like to say "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger..." Well... it never made me stronger at all.

Prologue September 13, 2012 Dear Niall, Happy Birthday! Today's actually been an okay day. I'm proud of you Niall, I really am. I'm hopelessly in love with you. I haven't stopped loving you; just trusting you. I'm tired of looking into the eyes of your posters. I want to see your eyes again. Feel your touch. Feel your lips against mine. To feel your fingers in my hair. I miss you so much, Ni. I want you back in my life. I want you to love me again. I wish I could see you one last time. In person. Just to get some closure. I hated you after you never answered my real letters. I wanted to never see you again. I wanted to slap you the next time I saw you. I was sad, and scared, alone. Haley helped but I mainly need you. I've grown closer to her since you left. I'm tired of hiding away. I want to have friends again. I miss you. I just want you and only you. But maybe that's my nerves talking. I just really wanna say that I'm proud of you. You've done good, Ni. I love you, Ni. I really do. I just wish I could trust you again. My last letter for a while. Maybe for forever. Love, Lillianne Collins My last letter to him. Maybe that's my closure. I really hope it's the last time. I'm tired of heart break. This is the truth.