Satchmo Turner is a failed private detective from the rusting heart of the Black Country who is reeling from the loss of his sister and fiancee. He's going nowhere at work, and treading water in life, until he picks up a simple missing person case and stumbles into something much bigger. Satchmo soon finds himself in over his head and embroiled a hunt for ancient treasure, unrequited love, violence and murder in a quiet English village stocked with a cast of characters he could never have imagined. Praise for Quid Pro Quo from Wattpadders: "Damn you for writing such a good book. I'm dead serious when I say you should look to get it published." "Overall, I think it's a great book and something I'd expect to see on a shelf in a bookstore somewhere." "I read another chapter and devoured the whole damn thing over an afternoon." "All-in-all the book was thoroughly enjoyable and very professionally written. Definitely better than almost everything else that I have encountered on Wattpad... it was a compelling read." "Your style of storytelling is lovely to read. I'm trying desperately to convince my husband to sign up to Wattpad so he can read it too."

A series of insanities and rants. Mostly autobiographical. Some blog posts that I like. Mostly just fun. Very miscellaneous. Some short stories. I used to have these up and actually found them again will add as I have time. With graphics.

1st place: Star Wars Fanfiction Awards Luke Skywalker is turning 8 in just a few days on Empire Day. Unfortunately, the Empire has ordered a galaxy-wide census on Empire Day. Instead of heading to the pod races, like his Uncle Owen had promised him, the Lars family heads to Mos Eisley to be counted in the census. Complications ensue when Luke runs in front of a landspeeder. The Emperor's henchman, Darth Vader, is not pleased about the disturbance and takes matters into his own hands. A Fan Reboot story of adventure, reunion, and redemption. 1st place: The Crayon Awards Fanfiction (all fandoms) 2nd place: Royalty Awards Fanfiction (all fandoms) 4th place: The Elimination Awards General Fiction July 2017 5th place for Best Tear Jerker (all genres): Crystal Awards Excerpt: Vader stiffened when he saw her face. He knew her. Beru. Vader knelt down next to her, using his cape to quell the bleeding from the boy's arm. Vader looked at the boy through his red lenses, sensing something he had never felt before. He should know this boy. He felt a connection. Owen broke past the stormtroopers who were now guarding the door to the headquarters, but they detained him before he reached Vader. "Let go of me. That's my son! Let go of me." Owen broke free and ran toward Vader. Vader turned just as Owen reached him, grabbing him with the Force by his neck and lifting Owen above him. Vader recognized him. "You!" Vader yelled. Something within Vader caused him to look back at the boy, and then to both Owen and Beru. There was no way that boy was theirs. There was no similarity. "You lie!"

Blade Runner meets Orwell's 1984 in Mother's Hand. Set in a crumbling dystopian future, Earth is ruled by the all-seeing and unforgiving Mother. Kal dutifully donates his body to the military for four years while his consciousness is stored. He will wake up with no memories of the things his body has done in war. Six years later, Kal wakes screaming a name he doesn't know. As he tries to reconnect with his former life he soon realizes that Mother is not finished with him yet. As Kal fights to avoid capture he begins to peel back the lies that surround Mother's system and must discover the truth about his past before it's too late.

A 19th century London courtesan agrees to a phony courtship with a navy captain and finds herself negotiating uncharted territory outside the boudoir. ***** The year is eighteen-thirteen. The place is London. Mistress Rosalind Hayes is a courtesan, raised in an orphan asylum and later tutored by one of the most respected courtesans of the time. Now, Rose caters to the whims of lusty nobles and businessmen, and she is determined to maintain her sovereignty. When Rose meets the Thompson siblings; Jules, a navy captain, and Alice, his spirited younger sister, the trio form an easy kinship. Rose learns they have recently lost their mother to smallpox, and she is persuaded by the siblings to pose as Jules's love interest in an attempt to bring their grief-stricken father out of a terrible depression. As luck would have it, Rose's genial manner helps to free the older man from his melancholy, but she also begins to feel things for the captain that threaten to topple her empire. CONTENT DISCLAIMER: Be prepared for a few mature scenes. This is a story about a courtesan, after all. Those with delicate sensibilities may want to keep a fainting couch nearby. COPYRIGHT NOTICE: This work is owned by the author. Please do not attempt to plagiarize or your reputation could end in ruins. IN OTHER WORDS: If you find this story on any online platform other than WATTPAD, I did not allow this. You may also be exposing yourself to malware. If you wish to read this story in its original, safe form, do it here on WATTPAD. COVER DESIGN: by @arpeggio-

Poems from my ❤️ mixed in the night. **cover by @judgezanderson

Being the new girl, officially sucks. Being the new Goth girl, wholeheartedly sucks. Being the new Goth girl, with horrific baggage, truly sucks. At my old school, I was thought of as 'cool and quirky'. Here, I'm just the weird new girl - the weird new girl whose parents are divorcing. I get stared at. Whispered about. Socially ostracised. I just know that my entire school life is now going to be an endless bout of loneliness and humiliation. Only, it would seem that Chas Summers doesn't think so. He has just stuffed a piece of paper in the back pocket of my jeans with one of his cocky and welcoming smiles. Now this boy, really is cool and quirky. A bit of a rebel, but he's definitely no rebel without a cause. That cocky smile of his, tells me that this could be the coming together of two quirky kindred spirits. That smile, tells me that I could have found my first friend here. Maybe being the new girl, isn't going to be so bad after all? Maybe being the new girl, will have its advantages? Maybe being me, is actually okay? I'm Mindy Diaz. The new Goth girl. Quirky and proud. The John Hughes Club Published by K B Mallion Copyright © 2020 K B Mallion

When Tess meets Will. He literally steals her heart in one sweet moment. But because of her deep rooted insecurities, she foolishly throws away all that they could have had for a thoughtless and unforgiving mistake. A painful mistake that she has forever regretted. A regret that she has carried around for twelve unforgiving years. She was given the time to heal, but never really got over losing the one man that she knew she could have truly loved. So after all of those years of trying to put it behind her, on one fateful day, Tess sees Will again. Will she finally get to say the words that she has had to wait twelve long years to say? Or is it just better to let sleeping love lie? LET SLEEPING LOVE LIE Published by K B Mallion Copyright © 2019 K B Mallion All rights reserved