SHUT THE FUCK UP WITH MIKE U FUCKIN NERDS. JUST ReAd u aSs (WARNING!: A lot of sex and profanity) *Cover and drawing by me! DO NOT MOTHAFUCKIN STEAL. I WILL FIND OUT. Finished book: 6/20/16

A little girl. No older than 3. Abandoned in the forest and left to die by her parents. The only thing she had was her family scrapbook and a stuffed animal. Befriended the beast called The Rake that day. She ate some poisonous berries by accident and almost died. Her new friend hollered to the being known as Slenderman. They saved her life and brought to their mansion, where she met more funny, weird, and creepy friends called "creepypastas." 13 years later, a new creepypasta comes by and they become the best of friends. His name is Toby Rogers. Otherwise known as Ticci Toby. Together, Toby helps find her find birth parents to get payback. After that, she starts developing a crush on the twitching boy. Why is this all so important to you? You are that girl.

They were shinobi: machines trained from childhood to kill or be killed. They were experienced soldiers; tools even. And that's why you can't blame them for being idiots in everything else. (A collection of short related chapters) "I KNEW it! I knew you had the hots for her!" "I've seen cooked fish before. That's charcoal. I'm sorry that you're culinarily disabled." "And you're surprised that your son gets a heart attack when you leave your arm in the living room." "I don't care! We're watching the entire fourth season of Kunoichi Diaries and you're going to learn whether you like it or not!" :: Cover By: Cosmo_Cat924