Welcome to 'What Not To Do In Percy Jackson Fanfiction' where I will brave the odds and ends to show my fellow PJO writers exactly what annoys readers and writers of Wattpad the most. This is not to be meant as offensive to the people whose stories may be similar to what I have written, but if you HAVE written a story a lot like the ones mentioned inside where the protagonists are total VS model Mary-Sue's... I humbly beg of you, change it immediately! Because the PJO characters are often frustrated with finding out they have a secret half-sister with magical blue hair and Gucci sunglasses. Percy: *facedesks* Annabeth: *groans* Leo: *sets Mary-Sue's hair on fire* O.O Leo: ..... What? SHE ATTACKED ME WITH HER TERRIBLE MARY-SUE-ISH NATURE! AND PLANNED TO MARRY ME OFF TO HER BFF, JUST NO... ** Warning: Mass hilarity ahead. Read at your own risk! Abandoned (I was 12, Jesus Christ...)

❝Hello, this is the Starb-❞ ❝HEEELP ME!! PLEASE! THERE'S A MURDERER IN MY HOUSE!❞ ❝OH SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!! WHAT DO I DO?! THIS IS STARBUCKS, NOT FREAKING 911. WAIT, HOLD ON. TRY TO KEEP YOURSELF ALIVE, I'LL CALL 911!! STAY CALM. IT'S GOING TO BE O- ❞ ❝Wait...did you just say Starbucks?❞ ❝Um...yeah?❞ ❝They have a hotline?❞ ---- fun conversations between two Potterheads over the Starbucks hotline. [highest rank: #6 in short story] [highest rank: #2 in short story 5/6/17]