They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

❝Someday, I will leave and never come back.❞ ❅ Daniella Evans plans on spending her summer holiday in complete and utter peace; and by peace, she clearly means lazing around while gaining inordinate amounts of weight in the very process. Her plan fails miserably as her parents announce that they'd planned a surprise trip to Australia, and since Daniella nurtured a hobby of taking photographs of whatever comes to view, she was clearly ecstatic. With countless trips to amusement parks, bonfires, numerous confessions, spontaneous kisses, and unveiled secrets, Daniella definitely didn't expect her summer holiday to turn out like this. And she definitely didn't expect to develop feelings for Christopher Stone; a cold, ruthless boy. But what happens when Daniella leaves? After all, time is their most limited commodity. One thing's for certain, though: life always gets in the way. 111 in teen fiction 12/3/2016 cover by @devoursheabooks

Fiona Pearce is the kind of girl who can never say no to anyone. As long as she can do something to help out, she'll do it in a heartbeat. So when her father faces a problem and asks for her help to find her missing brother, Finn, in a school where he works at, she's more than willing to extend a hand and go the extra mile. She sets off on a journey to find the missing boy in a population of a four hundred and sixty-five. The only problem is, Corner Stone High School is not just an ordinary high school. It is an exclusive school... for boys. Will she find him? Or will she be found out? And as she gets things straight, will something unexpected happen? Tossing the coin of luck and fate, she ventures to find the answers herself.

In which a guy dared to make friends with a girl finds out that nothing can be swept under the rug. [extended synopsis inside] © Birdcrowns 2018 #11 | SS

*** "*Sobs* I'm so happy to have a character that's exactly like me." - @TakenUsernameSoz. "This story is so normal that it's unique; a breath of fresh air! Gives us normal girls hope, hi hi!" - @LocalSlayer "This book is seriously my inspiration to not be afraid to show who I am." - @Who_Says_Duh "THAT IS SO ME!!!!! IS THIS SOME TYPE OF VOODOO, MAGICAL BOOK OR SOME SHIT?!?!" - @ThePanther10101. *** Let's face it, none of those cliché situations from movies between a guy and a girl ever happen in real life. I'm not going to end up accidentally bumping into my future husband in a café, spilling a latte over him. I'm not going to go up to some random stranger and ask him for directions and he'll become mesmerised by the colour of my eyes and fall in love with me. The window of my bedroom doesn't happen to be situated opposite to that of a 'bad boy neighbour'. I was daydreaming, again. Something I do on a daily basis. Nothing different, right? Well, let's just say I didn't snap out of my little 'trance' until I saw a guy waving frantically at me, smiling. Oh shit, he's hot. He probably thinks I was checking him out. Great, now he's coming over. Kill me. *** • Highest rankings: #1 in Modeling - #1 in Awkward - #3 in Humor.

Ellie West has her life all mapped out, but after disappointing news, she's forced to take in the mysterious Seth Carter as a roommate. Can the arrangement work? Sure. As long as she can accept his past, embrace his demons and maintain a firm grip on her heart.

Joselyn needs a job. Penelope needs someone to keep an eye on her boyfriend while she's gone. It's the perfect match. But, add in said boyfriend's charismatic side-kick and a troubled past desperate to resurface, and Josie's surveillance may be impossible to conceal. *COMPLETED* cover by @letsjam8 © Ann Valett 2019

[Highest Rank: #1 in Teen Fiction] Luna Prescott is a young special agent and Ace Crawford is the President's son. On one eventful day, she gets given the undercover mission to protect the Ace from the 'danger' in Westside High. Will her physical and mental abilities be enough to keep him safe, let alone survive the torture they call high school? *** We carried on walking through the amusement park until he pointed to a game, where you had to shoot down targets to win. "I bet I will beat you in that." He grabbed my hand and lead me to it. Little does he know. "What do I get when I win?" I laughed. "When? Pshhhh, I will get you a new motorcycle." I keep on forgetting how rich he is. "That means I don't need to catch rides with you anymore," I grin, "Game on, loser." He grabbed his water gun and shot at the cardboard targets and got down 15 out of 20 in the time he had. "Your turn, cupcake" Ace handed me the water gun. "Watch and learn, pretty boy." I grabbed the gun and aimed at the targets. After my two minute go, I shot down 20 out of 20. I turned to him with a smug expression and his mouth hung open. *** Luna Prescott is a 17 year old spy who has been working with the Agency for her whole life. Ever since her parents, former spies, had been found 'off the grid' on a mission when she was only 5, the agency took her and her brother in. She has ,since then, been training and going out to missions until her 17th birthday when she finds out what her most important mission of her life is. Ace Crawford, a 17 year old typical bad boy and he is the president's son. This brings him threats from people who hate his father and dangers that he needs help protecting himself from. [Started - 2/4/18] [Finished - 18/ 9/ 19] *** #51 Teen Fiction - 26/4/18 #45 Teen Fiction - 28/4/18 #42 Teen Fiction - 4/5/18 #37 Teen Fiction - 6/5/18 #5 Teen Fiction - 9/5/18 #3 Teen Fiction - 11/5/18 #1 Teen Fiction - 17/12/19 cover credits: @mara_cleia

When Vika gets kicked out of her flat, she moves in with her friend under one condition--she must babysit Cleo--the friend's best man's cat! She doesn't expect Cleo's owner to be the cold but delectably sexy Noel. And it turns out they'll be spending a lot of time together... ***** Self-proclaimed unambitious Vika is down on her luck. She's been fired from her job, kicked out of her apartment, and now she finds herself on her best friend's fiance's couch facing writer's block and a dreary future. To top it all off, she has to earn her keep by taking care of her friends' best man's cat. Vika's their maid of honour, so she can't exactly say no to such a simple request, especially when the best man in question is the drop-dead gorgeous Noel. Soon, sparks fly between Noel and Vika, but their chemistry is put to the test as wedding duties get underway. Can they keep the fire burning long enough not to make a scene at their friends' wedding? [[word count: 60,000-70,000 words]] Cover designed by Ashley Santoro

(alternatively called: slow burn, second-hand embarrassment, and shenanigans) A girl made up of short fuses, clumsy feet and copious amounts of sarcasm has to team up with her irritatingly obnoxious neighbour in the name of love (also known as raging teenage hormones). Because in the grand scheme of things, what's a little deal with the devil? (Spoiler Alert: absolute chaos.) cover by xdemonsflowerx