i was sinking, and i couldn't swim. {phan au} highest ranking - #10 in danandphil

"The less you care, the happier you are." He turned to face me, his blue eyes dull with traces of betrayal. "No. The less you care, the lonelier you are." - In a world where people have the ability to flip an emotions switch, many people lack feelings and sympathy in general- including Dan Howell after a tragedy strikes and he can't take it. However, he meets Phil Lester, the outgoing flirt with too big of a heart to handle. The two become close, and Dan soon realizes that even with his switch off, he can't deny that Phil is slowly reaching to turn it back on, and Dan can't seem to push his hand away.

Part 1 of the infamous series. Feelings appear. Sparks fly. Love rises. Problems occur. Please note: This story is now very old (7 years old in 2020) and I'd like to think my writing has improved since then! There are a bunch of cringey parts and bad writing in here, but enjoy and thanks for reading! :)

*'BEST PHANFICTION' WINNER (FANFICTION AWARDS 2018)* Daniel has anxiety and crumples paper to calm himself down. Phil has ADHD and diminishes hearts to bring himself up.

"Are you insane or are you just that broken?" he whispered, his face inches from mine. "I'm a little bit of both," I admitted, looking into his eyes. "A trip into my mind would be a trip into a nightmare."

Phil Lester hasn't had the best past. He was bullied and tormented because of his sexuality and had no friends for a long time. He then moved to London where he met Chris and PJ who help get his life back on track again. Suddenly he's under a spell when 'The Lonely Prince' - Dan Howell walks into the room and smiles at him. Every time Phil sees Dan he gets butterflies in his stomach. Someone from his past is out for Phil and will do anything to prevent Dan from getting close to him. This is just creative writing. I am in no way suggesting they are a couple although if they were I'd probably die of happiness! Enjoy! ~HelloAnonymousWriter~

SLOW UPDATES --- Ashrudel is a highly respected kingdom. The rulers have two healthy sons, Martyn and Philip. But when the king gets fatally sick, the queen forces her sons to marry a princess of their choosing. Each day is filled with strenuous trials, training, and more. Philip never felt an attraction towards girls, so every day has become torture for him. In a society that burns people at the stake for homosexuality, he knows it is crucial to keep that part about him a secret. Most days Philip sneaks out of the castle and into the village, seeing life from a normal person's perspective. But one day, he stumbles across a beautiful peasant named Daniel. --- This story might be triggering!!! If you are sensitive to homophobic slurs and violence, please read at your own risk. Set place in the past (somewhat of a Pirates Of The Caribbean type of society, but with a monarchy).

Dan is sick and Phil is suffering - so what the hell are they supposed to do now?

the air smells like the promise of tomorrow and nothing has ever smelled more terrifying

"we spend all this time waiting for tomorrow, yet it never arrives." the story of a boy who writes to his insecurities. the story of another who saves him. {phan} {lowercase intentional} {trigger warning: depression, implied self-harm/mentions of suicide}