Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

Faith Mitchell was never confident. She was happy to blend into the background, much to the protest of her friends. At 16, her life was a normal teenage cliche. She was in love with Jace, the obnoxious player who she couldn't have, and her biggest worry was whether or not he would finally come to his senses and see that she really was the one for him. That is until she is kidnapped and recruited by a secret agency of assassins. She is torn away from her normal teenage life and thrown into a world of guns, knifes and criminals. The agency mold her into the perfect killing machine, and at 19 she is no longer the shy girl that was snatched away from her uncomplicated life, but a ruthless killer who will stop at nothing to complete whatever mission she is on. Then, the agency has a new mission which involves Faith returning to her hometown, and facing her friends, family and the very boy who broke her heart just before it turned into stone. What will happen once Faith comes face to face with Jace? Will the obnoxious player be able to reach out and get the old Faith back without pressing any of her wrong buttons, considering that the shy girl he once knew now has a gun. (WATTY AWARDS 2011) (THE FICTION AWARDS 2017) ©makeandoffer

The territories are ruled by the stupidest cats ever, cats such as: Dickstar of AssClan, Mydealercutmeoffstar of StonerClan, Ashstar of IdontgiveashitClan, Titsmcgeestar of WhoreClan, OCDstar of WeneedmedicalhelpClan, and Doyoumindstar of SassyClan. Welcome to their world. You should've left while you could.

In Elemental magic you can be one of four magic types; water, fire, earth, and air. The only problem is Violet is none of these things. Is she what they call a magic dud, or is she something rarer, more powerful, and more dangerous than anyone could have imagined!? Teasers, "Em, most girls sneak out for a boy, you sneak out for a unicorn." I began to cry as it reached for my face."No!" I screamed. "Please No!" I went to pull back the shower curtain, but some nagging thought in the back of my head stopped me. I didn't have a little brother, so why was there a little boy in my bathroom? I gulped and with shaking hands pulled back the shower curtain. "What!? How could that be!?" I yelled, and covered my hand with my mouth. Shouting wasn't such a good idea right at this moment. If someone heard us and came up here to investigate the noise we were making, they would find a boy and a girl, a bloody knife with both their finger prints on it, and a very very dead body. "Don't touch her!" he hissed and lunged at Henry. Running through the night wearing nothing but a flimsy hospital dress, while waving a dismembered hand in his hand, was a strangeness no regular person could hope to inspire to.