In the fall of 2007, a quirky, sensitive girl named Hannah had a crush on an insensitive jerk. And I was her father. In the summer of 1984, a quirky, sensitive girl named Emily had a crush on an insensitive jerk. And I was that jerk. Loosely based on a true story (well, several, actually) "The Idiot Who Ran Into A Tree" is a comedic, bittersweet tale of parenting, teen angst, summer camp and a quarrelsome oak. All the names have been changed. The nicknames, however, have stayed the same.

"Sure, it was robots this time. But who's to say that it won't be zombies next time? And when the zombies do come, who's going to be ready for it? Me." - Marietta "I mean, like, say what you want about the robots, but at least they weren't gross!" - Lila Welcome to the long-awaited sequel to the irreverent and uproarious 2015 Watty Award-winning EVERYONE DIED + MY iPHONE STOPPED WORKING! It's been three years since humanity was *almost* wiped out and the lucky survivors are now breathing easy, confident that they no longer have anything to fear from murderous robots. And indeed, they do not. But unbeknownst to them, there is another extinction-level threat on the horizon. It's a ferocious new enemy... and it smells terrible. Cover art courtesy of my ridiculously talented friend Dave Pressler. http://www.davepresslerart.com

(This has been rewritten, so old comments might not make sense.) Welcome to Flora's Pet Shop! Through these doors you will find the most adorable bunny rabbits! The most incredibly gorgeous birds! And don't forget the reptiles! Any pet you'd want, we've got it! Just come on down and pick out your new best friend! Disclaimer: Our employees are not for sale! Sorry!

Now a digital pilot for SYFY The Society knows when we're going to die. They imprint it on our arms at birth. I was supposed to die yesterday. I'm the girl who's Expired. Winner of the 2020 Readers Choice Awards Cover by @Forcade

Harry upon receiving his creature inheritance begins to discover that not everything is how it seems, mainly involving his parents and the so called "Light Side". Harry now returns to Hogwarts for his 6th year and now has to deal with the discovery of his mate and his true heritage. Note: I'm a sucker for a happy ending. COVER IS NOT MINE! IF THE ARTIST WISHES FOR ME TO REMOVE IT PLEASE SAY SO!! Credit to :@upthehillart on instagram.

Harry Potter the boy who lived, survived the war against Voldemort and all his trials afterwards, he didn't let his experiences change him and he remained the same cheerful boy who loved magic. However, he broke when he discovered his families betrayal. Ginny his wife had been feeding him love potions, his best friends Ron and Hermione had been stealing his money. All his friends that survived were all traitors, he had been played for a fool his whole life. In his depression Harry walked through the veil, hoping to be reunited with the few people which truly loved him like Sirius. However, death greeted harry in a way he never expected, with a second chance, Harry decided that this time he would go where he would find his true friends and perhaps cause a bit of chaos along the way. This is a bxb (boys love) I do not own Harry Potter. All images used do not belong to me.

The survivors of the Second Wizarding War return to Hogwarts after a summer of rebuilding and healing. Harry had been offered a position for Auror Training, which he quickly declined in favor of one final year with his friends at Hogwarts. He hoped that the year would bring nothing but normalcy and quiet as he begins to move on. Draco had been pardoned after Harry Potter testified in his and his mother's defense during the Trials. He had been released from Azkaban on the condition that he return to Hogwarts and complete his final year. It would serve as part of his probation. With his father awaiting the Kiss and his mother a permanent prisoner in their own home, Draco struggles to find himself as he picks up the pieces of his life. This chronicles their Eighth and Final Year at Hogwarts. *I don't own Harry Potter. All rights belong to JK Rowling. This is a fan-fiction. Drarry / Eighth Year / boyxboy / fluff / angst / smut (you've been warned!) 😘

Draco Malfoy is up to something, I swear. Why can no one see, I know him better than anyone, why won't anybody trust my hunch? The "Boy Who Lived" is after me, but he's wrong as usual. I don't like what's going on either, but he can't know that, he'd think I'm weak. It sucks being the Chosen One. (A/N) Ok so I wrote this one a while back, and it's my first book to reach over 10k, yay :) I hope you enjoy, and if you want to see the story continued then I made a sequel called Freak, containing more Drarry fluff #spon. I mean, if you like this one, that's pretty great too, heh.

Andrew, a twenty-six-year-old literature graduate, has been through more drama than many his age. From suffering obesity to arthritis, and then anorexia after drastic attempts to lose body fat, Andrew grows more conscious of his body. He shields himself from the rest of the world in a reserved cabin tucked away in a small town where he dwells in solitude and self-pity. But things can't stay the same forever and Andrew's carefully planned out walls fall around him with the arrival of his uncle's fiancee's son, Ethan. Ethan will more than disrupt Andrew's 'perfect' life. He'll also teach him the sole act of acceptance.

It started with a fortunate mistake It ended in a mistaken fortune. * * * * They get gold if they're lucky. Most of the time, they settle for silver. It's not a question for Damien Jacobs. For his whole life, he has been stealing from families with his controlling father as his accomplice. After a whole life of living like a criminal, Damien finds himself having a change of heart when he starts to get cozy with the son of the rich family that he's trying to steal from. But regardless of his father's commands, Damien is willing to leave his theft days behind.