"It's like you're a whole new person when you forget to be afraid. And that person you become, he's free." ☾❀☽ When Phil was ten, he got lost in the woods, and was found by a strange winged boy with a secret that not everyone could see. The pair fell in love, only to have their memories of each other stolen away from them forever. Years later, the short and shy Phil Lester meets the tall and sarcastic Dan Howell who wears a flower in his hair and seems to be hiding something. For a reason that neither of them can explain, they are drawn to each other. {This fanfiction is relatively safe} NO suicide NO depression NO self harm NO eating disorders It does have some minor triggers, including bullying, and slight anxiety. Message me if you need specifics, and I'll let you know. Stay safe.

Phil Lester is sweet and cute; known for his kindness and enthusiasm. Dan Howell is a tough, cold outsider; known as the school's stereotypical 'bad boy'. But if he's so bad, then why on earth did he rescue Phil Lester and give him a smile which would melt anyone's heart?

Phil was always a girly boy. He loved playing with Barbies and wearing pink. Even though his mom assured him it was perfectly normal, he sensed something was different. One day, a boy appeared on the other side of Phil's fence, sitting by a tree and drawing in his notebook. Phil's mom told him this was their new neighbor, and Phil found him intriguing. Boys had always been a mystery to Phil, even though he was one himself. When Phil talked to the brunet boy, he became tongue-tied and blushed, yet he couldn't help but watch him through a small hole in the fence. In just a few days, they grew closer, developing trust and perhaps even liking each other. But they were just kids, with big expectations and a different outlook on reality. This is a story about coming out, teenage drama, and two boys who live on opposite sides of a big wooden fence. (teenage Phan)

dan is the best man at phil's wedding ; copyright © 2016

the air smells like the promise of tomorrow and nothing has ever smelled more terrifying

Dan has given up on ever being happy. Life has lost its meaning, and everything he seems to do causes some form of destruction, and Dan is so tired of destroying the things he used to love. He's lost so much, and he's scared of losing Phil, the only thing he can bring himself to care about. But Dan can't see past his own depression that Phil is struggling with bulimia, and that he's equally good at hiding his dark thoughts as Dan. And as Dan walks through the streets alone at night getting high to escape from the hell he's trapped himself in, will he be able to see that maybe the happiness he craves so desperately is not on the streets in the form of white pills, but inside his own apartment in the form of Phil Lester? Or will it be too late... WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE, SEXUAL SITUATIONS, USE OF DRUGS, VIOLENCE, HIGH LEVELS OF ANGST, BULIMIA, AND THEMES OF SUICIDE. IT IS NOT SUITABLE FOR YOUNGER READERS.

{{ part two of psychedelia }} It's been two years since Dan moved out of the apartment to go to a rehabilitation centre, and in that space of time he's heard nothing from Phil. Not even a "hello." Dan's scared that Phil's moved on and forgotten about him, and since they both stopped vlogging Dan doesn't know what's happening in Phil's life. Is he still living in London? Has he moved back to Manchester? Is he even alive? So now that Dan is finally off his medication and he's completely clean, he should be happy again, right? Sometimes, the most painful thing is when the person who you share all of your best memories with becomes a slowly fading memory, and you can't do anything except watch and scream as the past disappears, almost like it never existed in the first place. And it fucking hurts. WARNING: THIS STORY CONTAINS STRONG LANGUAGE, SEXUAL SITUATIONS, MENTIONS OF DRUGS, VIOLENCE, HIGH LEVELS OF ANGST, BULIMIA, AND THEMES OF SUICIDE. IT IS NOT SUITABLE FOR YOUNGER READERS.

in a world where your moods are visible above your head, displayed through pictures and icons, it's impossible to hide your true feelings. however dan howell seems to be lacking this. labelled as an emotionless freak, dan is outcasted because his moods are never visible. that is, until an endlessly happy boy named phil wonders why.

Phil Lester is 'special', having the power to manipulate water with just a flick of his hand. Because of this, he was transferred into the special school, Dahlia Academy, which was built to harbor students with magical abilities. Here, he meets Dan Howell, a cold and distant pyromaniac who doesn't get close to anyone. Based loosely off of the manga/anime of Gakuen Alice. (Cover credit: monster7437)

*'BEST PHANFICTION' WINNER (FANFICTION AWARDS 2018)* Daniel has anxiety and crumples paper to calm himself down. Phil has ADHD and diminishes hearts to bring himself up.