don't read while drinking milk
11 stories
Fraternizing with the Enemy by hyrule
hyrule
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(alternatively called: slow burn, second-hand embarrassment, and shenanigans) A girl made up of short fuses, clumsy feet and copious amounts of sarcasm has to team up with her irritatingly obnoxious neighbour in the name of love (also known as raging teenage hormones). Because in the grand scheme of things, what's a little deal with the devil? (Spoiler Alert: absolute chaos.) cover by xdemonsflowerx
I'm The Gang Leaders Possession  by xThePineappleGirlx
xThePineappleGirlx
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|| Highest Rank - #1 in Humor || Aria Daniels has one of the most vivacious personalities ever. She is a crazy teenage girl that is impossibly hard to drag down. So what happens when she finds a letter telling her that her brother has been kidnapped and won't be returned unless she pays sixty thousand dollars? She doesn't follow the rules of the letter and get the money. Oh no, in fact, she breaks into the kidnappers base with a bobby pin, steals their cupcakes, paints their abs with white paint and somehow ends up in London with a room full of gang members and a bright pink gun. This is one hell of a crazy story. ~~~~~ WARNING: This book is weird as fuck. It's no joke, I am telling you now that all the characters might as well be high on drugs the whole time because some of the shit they do makes no sense but I promise it will make you laugh (if not I'll give you a cookie). [COMPLETED] Copyright © by Laylaa Khan
Once Upon a Bathroom Stall by hyrule
hyrule
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❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer reviews? How many stars out of five?❞ ❝What are yo- oh my god, I'm going to fucking kill Marie.❞ (alternatively called: a lot of people shit with pens) written in dialogue // cover by xhemmingshugsx
Camp Runaway by leigh_
leigh_
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Running away from their jobs as camp counselors, Ellie and Seb embark on a road trip with unexpected turns en route to their destination - New York. ***** Camp Raukawee was meant to be where Ellie Morrison and Sebastian Lee spent their summer working as camp counselors, but they've had enough. Escaping in the middle of the night, the friends hatch a crazy plan to make their way to New York to visit Ellie's dad, who she hasn't seen since he moved five years ago. Along the way, however, a series of cities and events have the pair not only questioning their individual futures, but wondering what will happen to the growing spark between them as the countdown to adulthood begins. [[word count: 90,000-100,000 words]] Cover designed by Gillian Goulet
A Bad Boy Stole My Bra- SAMPLE by Cherry_Cola_x
Cherry_Cola_x
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A BAD BOY STOLE MY BRA is published and no longer available on Wattpad. It is available in multiple languages, including English, French, German, Italian and Indonesian as paperback and e-book internationally. It is also available as an adaptation on the app Episode - 'It Started With a Bra.' This copy has the first 3 chapters ONLY. SPIN OFF SEQUEL (Same characters): The Anti Delinquent System is fully available on Wattpad! It follows Chase's love story, with large amounts of Riley, Alec, Joe, Violet and Dylan! Picture this: You wake up in the middle of the night, swamped in your star wars covers and completely and utterly groggy to the extent that you look like something from the Monsters Inc. movie. You hear a sound, so you sit up and turn your lamp on, and that's when you see it. Your new neighbour, clambering halfway through your window (Still managing to look like some sort of a Greek god, I may add) holding your MICKEY MOUSE BRA. What do you do? Well, you scream obviously. Then what? Why, you get revenge of course. Romance #1 Humour #3 ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Cover and Official Trailer made by @moonxriver
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How to Fall in Love ✔ by roastedpiglet
roastedpiglet
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They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)
That Nerd  by xThePineappleGirlx
xThePineappleGirlx
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|| Highest Rank - #1 in Teen Fiction || Ever broken into Disney World at three in the morning? Ever pranked the police and almost gotten arrested for it? Ever played paintball at the park in nothing but your underwear? Maya hasn't. But she is about to... Dylan Thompson is the most popular guy in the school and is seeking revenge after Maya slapped him for being a 'pervert'. What would you do if you were Maya? Move to Mexico and change your name to Rico and then proceed to move into an apartment with a goat owner named Pablo, obviously. What does Maya do? She doesn't run, instead she kicks him where the sun don't shine and slaps him again. Time for revenge nerd. --- Cover by the best human @1Dgurlwrites WARNING: Contains mild language & may cause many eyes rolls, fangirl moments and tears. [COMPLETED] Copyright © by Laylaa Khan
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The Bad Boy, Cupid & Me by Slim_Shady
Slim_Shady
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Reece smirked, "Trust me Chloe, the good girl always falls for the bad boy." Chloe Armel is a good girl. She never gets in trouble, gets excellent grades and is loved by everyone. Enter Reece. Wild, badass and has an ego that honestly couldn't get any bigger. He gets into fights, breaks every single rule and couldn't care less about the consequences that come with it. When Chloe's parents leave to treat sick children in Cambodia for two weeks, she is forced to stay at her neighbour's house. Her neighbour has a son, and it's Reece Carter. Sneaking out. Parties. Drinks. Hash Brownies. Flirting. Breaking the law...and road trips. Add a few shots of Cupid's arrows and what have we got? No clue. All we know is, it'll be unforgettable.
The Baby Project by leigh_
leigh_
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Avery and Andrew have been best friends since middle school; they're close. But they're about to get a whole lot closer when paired up for the project like no other: the baby project.
Worst Story on Wattpad ✓ by arcticstars
arcticstars
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Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!