Eli didn't think much about the city's newest so-called hero, but he supposed Vigilante wasn't all that bad. Granted, he was kind of a jerk and if he ever tried to kiss Eli again he was definitely getting punched. A story about a starving college student, making a living serving coffee and the local vigilante with a crush. - - - - - - - - - Highest rank #1 in Action, Wattys 2016 winner in the Trailblazers category! Featured 6/3/2016-7/23/2017

❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer reviews? How many stars out of five?❞ ❝What are yo- oh my god, I'm going to fucking kill Marie.❞ (alternatively called: a lot of people shit with pens) written in dialogue // cover by xhemmingshugsx

"Hello?" "Why do '24 hours, 7 days a week' shops have locks on their doors?" "Uh-" "Why is the meaning of life hard to find when we have dictionaries?" "Um perso-" "Why is the word 'abbreviation' so long?" "I dont kno-" "If a cow laughed really hard would milk come out its nose?" "Hey-" "Does a postman deliver his own mail?" "MYSTERY PERSON!" "Yes?" "I don't know the answers to your stupid questions." "Okay then, how's life?" ---------------------------------------- Hello fellow readers! Thank you for clicking on my book, I hope you enjoy it. This book is from my imagination so please don't steal it. Highest ranking in short story: #5 ** this story is completed ** My story is edited but I know it's not perfect. If anyone finds any spelling or grammar mistakes feel free to comment in the comment section. Thank you.