He always assumes I want money. That money can replace my desire for a mother, for a female figure who will guide me through the darkness. All he can provide is money. He assumes that because I use the money, that I'm happy, that I don't spend night hunched over my toilet bowl physically sick to my stomach with the guilt of killing my mother. He assumes that because I have friends, that the smile on my face is genuine. That because I smile and confidently stride out of my room in a bikini, that I love myself and the way I look. He assumes everything about me, because he doesn't know me. I'm his daughter, and with the simple fact, he assumes that by just looking at me he knows my every thought. Does he know of the blood I spill when I have no other method of coping? Does he know of the times I sit and ponder about what it would be like to go through death? Does he know that when he leaves for work, I cry myself to sleep and wish for a mother? Does he know that I could care less about him? I hate him. But he loves me. Does he know, that through all this mess, I just want a mother. Because according to Disney, mother knows best?

Demi's running from a dark past, and she meets Wilmer along the way. Can he get her to trust him enough to let him show her the light?

David has been married to his husband, Simon, for two years and knows Simon so well that he knows when Simon is happy or when he's melancholy. One of Simon's melancholy moods occurs and David is determined to make Simon himself again.

❝ baby, you've got to learn that sometimes it's good to be a little bad ❞ - in some ways, it's your typical high school romance. but really, it's not. teenage tearaway simon cowell and wallflower david walliams can't help it when their worlds collide. with an absent father and a drunk for a mother, simon is permanently wrapped up in drugs and sex, and with parents who refuse to accept his sexuality, david can't help but get high off both.

❝ i lived a lifetime with him and he doesn't even know it ❞ - in the sequel to my little secret, we learn that people are never the same as they are in your dreams. when david wakes up from his coma and discovers that the past six months he'd spent with simon were in fact just a fantasy, can he relive it? this time, for real.

If a person's life can change in a second, what would a month be like? David Walliams has gotten into a car crash and he's unconscious so Simon Cowell decides to write him a series of letters over a period of a month to tell him what's been happening. |all grammar mistakes are intentional after the first chapter because they are written as though Simon is writing them to David| UPDATES FRIDAYS AND TUESDAYS

x

❝ you, my darling, will always be my little secret ❞ - life is a blur and a mystery. we learn this through a tale in which the wrong place, the wrong time and the wrong amount of alcohol accumulates in so much more than planned for simon cowell and david walliams.

❝ everything is perfect, baby ❞ - affairs, lust and a four year old child never go well together, and when david walliams' skit of being in love with simon cowell unexpectedly snowballs into more, he learns that it's impossible to have perfection last forever.

Paula Abdul, Simon Cowell, and a strange, strange relationship that started on day one of American Idol.