Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘹·𝘰𝘵·𝘪𝘤 /𝘬𝘸𝘪𝘬ˈ𝘴ä𝘥𝘪𝘬/ 𝘢𝘥𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘤𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤; 𝘶𝘯𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭. 𝘭𝘢·𝘤𝘶·𝘯𝘢 /𝘭əˈ𝘬(𝘺)o͞𝘰𝘯ə/ 𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯 𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯: 𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘶𝘯𝘢; 𝘱𝘭𝘶𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯: 𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘶𝘯𝘢𝘦; 𝘱𝘭𝘶𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘯: 𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘶𝘯𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘶𝘯𝘧𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘢𝘭; 𝘢 𝘨𝘢𝘱. ---------------------------------------- collection of stories i've written. some are worse than others. enjoy the ride while it lasts. "𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐱𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐮𝐧𝐚." - "𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞."

WARNING! Please be advised that this is not a bedtime story about sparkly fairies and pink unicorns. This book may contain graphic descriptions of poisoned apples and witches' ovens. It is not appropriate for supernatural beings under the age of 377 (excluding vampires and werewolves). DISCLAIMER: Wicked Witches Inc. and Evil Stepmother Enterprises are not responsible for any maiming, mass murder or permanent insanity resulting from the reading of this book.

You've never, ever read a book like this. When a sexually-transmitted plague breaks out in Ashley Young's small town, leaving its victims with a bizarrely amplified libido, everything about her life changes. DEAD IN BED is partly a suspense thriller with a strikingly unique story, partly a page-turning mystery about a disease that makes people hopelessly crave sexual contact, and partly a neo-western adventure in the American heartland. For readers who can handle a smart, controversial female protagonist who's willing to do anything -- no matter how difficult or morally questionable -- in order to survive, the series pulls them in like an unshakeable addiction. . . . Bailey Simms, teen author of DEAD IN BED, is stuck at home with a rare medical condition. Writing is her only escape, so she's determined to keep her salacious series hidden from her strict father. Soon an older boy starts to secretly help her, and Bailey finds new opportunities for freedom she's never had. But as DEAD IN BED grows in popularity, and Bailey's fans start to clamor for the sequel, she learns that being a successful Wattpad author may come with a terrifyingly dangerous price.