I don't have (that much) money to give you or a life size cut out of Erwin's eyebrows... But what I DO have is a bunch of one-shots! Tailored to your approval for your pleasure... Whether it be through masturbation or not. (100% going to hell) Feel free to request as much as you want!

Book One of the Scary Tales The zombie sequel to Snow White begins where the classic fairy tale ends, with the Prince’s kiss waking Snow from her cursed slumber. Snow wakes up, but she doesn’t wake up right. Now a deranged zombie, Snow infects both the Prince and the seven dwarfs’ leader. That leaves the young dwarf Grouchy, who is secretly in love with Snow, to find a cure for her malicious curse. So begins an epic journey that pits the lovesick Grouchy against dwarf-hating human soldiers, Snow’s ever-growing zombie horde, and his own bad temper. But when Grouchy and his motley crew of survivors escape Snow’s clutches and seek refuge in a nearby human village, he soon finds that her affliction has spread faster and further then he ever could have imagined. Snow is hell-bent on spreading her horrid curse across the land, and it’s up to Grouchy to stop her before it’s too late. That Risen Snow is the first book of THE SCARY TALES, a series of dark fantasy novels being published by StoneGate Ink. If you enjoy this book and would like a free ebooks of the next book in the series, please post an honest review of That Risen Snow on Amazon.com. Once you're review is online, email me and I will send you a free ebook of That Wicked Apple, book two of THE SCARY TALES. If you'd like to receive free ebooks of future books in THE SCARY TALES series in exchange for honest Amazon.com reviews, please visit my website and sign up for my email newsletter: http://www.robboley.com Plus, all email newsletter subscribers receive a free short story! Buy/Review THAT RISEN SNOW on Amazon: http://myBook.to/thatrisensnow Buy/Review the sequel, THAT WICKED APPLE, on Amazon: http://myBook.to/thatwickedapple Thanks so much for reading!

Book Two of the Scary Tales: A Killer Serial As the Scary Tales saga continues, Grouchy and his motley crew of survivors find the human village of Abundance overrun with Snow’s zombies. Grouchy gains an unlikely partner in the treacherous Queen Adara, who gave his beloved Snow that wicked apple. Adara agrees to help Grouchy in his quest to find a cure, but only to serve her own devious plans. The apple that transformed Snow into a zombie has now grown into a cursed tree. Destroying it may be Grouchy’s only chance to cure his true love. But first, he must escape Abundance and face the resurrected Prince Mikael, who thanks to Snow is now more powerful than ever. Except the Prince, Snow, and her apple are only the beginning. Grouchy and Adara soon learn that Snow isn’t merely a rabid monster. Grouchy’s beloved Snowflake is controlling her fellow zombies and manipulating them for her own dark ends. To make matters worse, the curse that empowers Snow continues to grow stronger—and more unpredictable. AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is where I’m posting sample chapters of Book Two of THE SCARY TALES. The full text of Book One, THAT RISEN SNOW, is on Wattpad, but I won't be posting the full text of THAT WICKED APPLE anytime soon. So please be aware of that before starting this book. If you want to read the entire book, you can either buy it on Amazon.com (http://myBook.to/thatwickedapple) or you can get a free ebook copy of THAT WICKED APPLE in exchange for an honest book review of THAT RISEN SNOW on Amazon. Here's how: 1) Read THAT RISEN SNOW on Wattpad. 2) Post an honest review on Amazon (http://myBook.to/thatrisensnow). 3) Once your review goes public on Amazon, email me via my website or Wattpad. 4) I'll email you THAT WICKED APPLE ebook. And if you'd like to receive advance reader ebook copies of future books in THE SCARY TALES series in exchange for honest reviews, sign up for my email newsletter at http://www.robboley.com. Plus you'll get a free short story!