*****WATTYS 2015 WINNER!***** WATTPAD STAFF PICK (9/7/15) In the end, the robots win. But you already knew that. "Everyone Died + My iPhone Stopped Working" is a collection of short interviews with some of the survivors. People who have tremendous insight into the rise of Artificially Intelligent machines or, more often, don't. Why did the robots rise up? What did they want? Why couldn't they be stopped? Can they be stopped now? Is humanity doomed? And what the f--k is going on with the squirrels? You will get the answers to all of these questions. Or some of these questions. Or none of these questions. We'll see. I will be updating this once a week until I run out of stuff that I find funny. Then I'm done. Cover art courtesy of the hilarious and ridiculously talented Dave Pressler. (http://www.davepresslerart.com)

"I wish I would die. I've thought those words many times. But it's a hard thing to say out loud. It's even scarier to feel you might mean it." - Thirteen Reasons Why A reply to Netflix Original, "Thirteen Reasons Why", and book by Jay Asher.

❝ I really hope you don't expect me to do anything. Because I won't. I don't care. Cry all you like but when it comes down to it, you don't need me and I don't need you. Love isn't real. It only exists in fairytales and Disney movies. This is real life, honey. Get used to it. ❞