❝ CREATIVITY BLEEDS FROM THE PEN OF INSPIRATION ❞ a cookbook of zoe's top secret recipes ↝ warning ; severely untested recipes, may result in explosions, serious injuries or death ↝ disclaimer ; in no way am i saying i am the gordon ramsay of graphic design and in truth be told, i'm most probably the neville longbottom instead ↝ highest ranking ; NF275

why am i like this

//in which we, the graphic family, give you cover or edit tutorials//

As far as lazy roommates go, Death is probably as bad as they come. Rosa Delgada only wants a nice, ordinary weekend. When some guy claiming to be the Reaper comes knocking on her door, any plans of normality are thrown straight out of the window. Now she's got to worry about Death sleeping on her sofa, the forces of evil hunting down her new roommate, and - worst of all - all the post-break-up comfort food she keeps eating. And to make matters worse, Death is almost certainly going to go down in the record books as being the universe's least helpful roommate. He may be a horseman of the apocalypse but he'll be damned if he doesn't do the dishes. But life's going to get a whole lot harder for Rosa. Death's sudden holiday is resulting in some grizzly repercussions, and now all of the Underworld is out to drag him back. There's only so far sarcasm and strawberry ice cream will get you.

After a depressing rejection, botanist Carmen moves in with two lodgers: a mad astrophysicist, and what appears to be an inter-dimensional hell demon. It isn't the ideal trio, but they make it work. From accidentally dating racists, to defending their home against the friendly neighborhood Estonian mafioso, the lodgers bond to form an unlikely (and dysfunctional) family. [written in 2017]

"Your name's Anna and you're an anesthesiologist?" "Yes." "That's punny." "I can't wait to knock you unconscious." +++ Anna is an anesthesiologist. She's surprised that people laugh at the phonetic connection between her job and her name. She's even more surprised when one of her patients wishes he doesn't wake up right before she sends him under. And when he wakes, he says he could bear living another day if it meant staying with her, which leaves Anna wondering if he's just delirious or serious...

An orphan with a dubious pedigree strives to secure her future through marriage, but as she stumbles through the dance of courtship, she begins to question who she truly is -- and who she wants to be. ***** Edith Shepley looks like a Wyrm. She takes after her father, whoever he was, but that doesn't change things. She is a proper Folk lady nonetheless, trained from the cradle to govern as Baroness of Ewert someday. And she knows her duty. Now a woman at sixteen years old, Edith must marry and beget Ewert's next heir. She obediently considers suitor after suitor, some sweet, some baffling, some detestable. But the more she sees of her mother's society, the more Edith questions whether she really is a Folk lady, after all. And the more she's stung by its insults, its injuries and injustices, the more she doubts she really wants to be. Book One of The Unfinished Wyrm! Wattys 2017 "The Storysmiths" winner!

Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

"Every fairytale begins in the rain." When you run into an old bookshop in the middle of Paris to escape a storm, who knows who you might meet there. {Written 2014.}

Sixth-year Slytherin, Alice Rhowen, is, along with her boyfriend Draco Malfoy, the most powerful Slytherin student. She's the outcast of a family full of Gryffindors. When Draco and his family invite her to their house for Christmas break, her life is never the same.