I Need A New Phone 'Cos Jeff the Dick Broke It. Now I Can't Use Tumblr Anymore. (Also My Wi-Fi Went Out.) Camryn Reynolds is that one girl who never puts down her phone. It's like her life. She's a Tumblr girl and is very passionate about it. She's weird, awkward and hangs out with people just as weird. But, of course, rumor spreads of the notorious Jeff the Killer and she's immediately intrigued. Little did she know that the smiling killer is actually real. She realizes this when she comes face-to-face with the man. Unfortunately, he breaks her phone which nobody on this Earth should ever, EVER do. So Jeff is forced to be her slave as payment/punishment for breaking her precious phone, Richard. Yes, its name is Richard. Can Jeff repay his seemingly endless debt or will he stay Camryn's man-servant...FOREVER?! He probably won't repay his debt. Yeah, he definitely won't. This is something Jeff never expected: to be enslaved by an introvert who could care less that all of the CreepyPastas she reads are real. [WARNING: LOTS OF STUPID]

so peeps welcome 2 my life

What My Boredom Leads To

Trump was elected president. But he fell in love with Justin, the one who loved Obama the most. What will happen with this forbidden one sided love? Side Note: What am I doing with my life? This is an actual school assignment. I can't believe I'm actually submitting this.

Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

In a world where all the gods of myth and legend are real, 8 year old Suzy Miller's having some trouble finding the deity that'll answer her prayers. When she finally discovers her god, it's not what she expected.

"You're an asshole," I blurted. "You're such an asshole that your actual asshole is jealous." Silence. What the hell did I just say? Out of all the insults, I choose one that makes the least sense? Damn it, why couldn't I just have been born normal... Wait, never mind. Psh, screw sanity. "Can we keep her?" Tyler suddenly says, bouncing on his tippy toes. "Please, Keith? Can we keep her? Huh, huh, huh?" What am I, a pet? "Keith" whipped his head towards Tyler so fast I could've sworn I heard a crack. "Keep her?" he echoed. "No, Tyler, we can not keep her." Thank you. "She's utterly useless to us, and you want to keep her?" I gasped, placing a hand over my chest. Useless? Damn, these people are rude as hell. "But," Tyler whined, walking over to me. I tensed all over when he squished my cheeks together. "Look at how adorable she is. She's just so innocent... you'd never suspect anything bad from her." Keith expression changed, to one I knew very well from my experiences with Val. Lightbulb. "Tyler, you are a genius," Keith says. Tyler's hands stop squishing my cheeks. "I am?" "He is?!" everyone else says. Keith doesn't reply, just keeps on grinning wickedly. And suddenly I have a feeling that I am not gonna make it out of here alive. - WARNING: VERY CRINGE WORTHY MATERIAL NOW AVAILABLE TO PURCHASE http://www.lulu.com/shop/angel-zenith/the-gangleader-kidnapped-me/paperback/product-23087208.html Highest Rank: #1 in Humor April 19, 2015 CoAuthor: DreamCreature

A werewolf boy finds a mate. That mate is... A POTATO. How will their classic 'potato loves werewolf' love story unfold?

Are you a Potato? If you are, do you dare read this horrifying story? I wouldn't if I were you...

A beautiful love story about gay memes