"You're an asshole," I blurted. "You're such an asshole that your actual asshole is jealous." Silence. What the hell did I just say? Out of all the insults, I choose one that makes the least sense? Damn it, why couldn't I just have been born normal... Wait, never mind. Psh, screw sanity. "Can we keep her?" Tyler suddenly says, bouncing on his tippy toes. "Please, Keith? Can we keep her? Huh, huh, huh?" What am I, a pet? "Keith" whipped his head towards Tyler so fast I could've sworn I heard a crack. "Keep her?" he echoed. "No, Tyler, we can not keep her." Thank you. "She's utterly useless to us, and you want to keep her?" I gasped, placing a hand over my chest. Useless? Damn, these people are rude as hell. "But," Tyler whined, walking over to me. I tensed all over when he squished my cheeks together. "Look at how adorable she is. She's just so innocent... you'd never suspect anything bad from her." Keith expression changed, to one I knew very well from my experiences with Val. Lightbulb. "Tyler, you are a genius," Keith says. Tyler's hands stop squishing my cheeks. "I am?" "He is?!" everyone else says. Keith doesn't reply, just keeps on grinning wickedly. And suddenly I have a feeling that I am not gonna make it out of here alive. - WARNING: VERY CRINGE WORTHY MATERIAL NOW AVAILABLE TO PURCHASE http://www.lulu.com/shop/angel-zenith/the-gangleader-kidnapped-me/paperback/product-23087208.html Highest Rank: #1 in Humor April 19, 2015 CoAuthor: DreamCreature

Having enhanced senses cannot help one earn a living. A useless special ability--or at least, that's what Shia Sheridan believes. But when she is caught for a crime she did not commit, this useless ability saves her, leading her to enroll in Titan Academy, the very place she hates with a passion. *** Titan Academy is an esteemed school where students train to improve their special abilities. However, for seventeen-year-old village girl Shia Sheridan, it's nothing more than a despicable place where wealth speaks the loudest. Fate plays a joke on her when her best friend, Lucas, becomes part of a crime committed within the academy, and owning that crime in his stead leads Shia to the headmaster and principal, who then offers her a proposal she dare not refuse--in exchange for her freedom, she must become one of the special group of students joining the annual survival game called Linus Cup. Now, not only is she fighting for a spot she did not want in the very academy she hated, but also for her dear life as well. Can Shia survive till the end? STATUS: Published under Summit Media - Cloak Pop Fiction DISCLAIMER: This story is written in Taglish COVER DESIGN BY: Rayne Mariano

Facts, only complete and utterly useless. Have fun.