❝In which a celebrity dials a random number in hope of finding one last thing to make him smile before he commits suicide at the end of the month.❞ "I'm going to commit suicide in one months time." "I think you have the wrong number." "It can't be the wrong number Princess. I picked a random number from the catalog." "Why on earth would you do that?" "Because you, sweetheart, are now my own personal suicide helpline. Your job is to make the last month of my life worth living." ______________________

Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

"Write down one word that describes you." psy·cho·path noun noun: psychopath; plural noun: psychopaths a person suffering from chronic mental disorder with abnormal or violent social behavior. ⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄⌃⌄ "I'm psychopathic..." Oliver muttered as he glared at me suspiciously and condescendingly. He was waiting for me to run away. Grinning widely to piss him off, I shrugged. "If you're a psychopath, then I must be a lunatic. Because I like you. And because of that, I'm not leaving." He'd watched me stand my ground because we'd surely been through way too much for me to give up now. A small smile spread through his emotionless facade and in a second, he was back to who I really saw him for. He let out a laugh, "Do you have a death wish?" S L O W U P D A T E S C O V E R B Y @ZiaDavis

you said it would sting. //train tracks with miles// © 2015 flawed-

all i've done defeats me //rooftops with miles// [sequel to brown haired boy] friday, may 1st: #2 in short story

"This is happy helpline, think happy thoughts." "No." "No what?" "No happy thoughts." ©2017 janaebello All rights reserved

"It is your choice," he said, stepping so close to me that our lips were almost touching. "Either do what I say - or get another job." My heart stood still as I gazed up into his deep, dark, dangerous eyes... In a world where women's only role in life is to sit at home and look pretty, Lilly is determined to fight for her freedom. There's only one problem: a powerful man blocking her way.

A painful breakup pushes Kyla Evans to get into a fake relationship with the person her ex-boyfriend hates the most: Seth Everett. But what will she do when the game starts to feel too real? ***** Seventeen-year-old Kyla has sworn off love. After getting dumped all too suddenly by her longtime boyfriend Cedric, she becomes convinced that people are never really who you think they are. So when notorious playboy Seth Everett suggests that Kyla fake date him to get back at Cedric, it seems like the perfect plan... as long as she doesn't end up falling for him. Content and/or trigger warning: This story mentions cancer, which may be triggering for some readers. [[word count: 150,000-200,000 words]]