Screw you, Wattpad, this book DOES belong in the humor category. // All of these quotes are (regrettably) 100% true... // Sorry for the unreadable cover - Wattpad Covers FAILED ME. // This is the third book in the series, but don't feel obligated to read the first two by any means (although they're pretty hilarious if I do say so myself). // The fourth book is now up! // I also have a "Weird Things I Heard in Life" series if you wanna check that out! // *THERE WILL PROBABLY BE CUSSING IN THIS BOOK. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED* // [#65 in Humor as of 2/8/18]

This is the second book in the "Weird Things" series, so make sure to check out the first one! Basically just a collection of the stupid(ly funny) things I hear at school. For the best morsels of my life outside of school, read "Weird Things I Heard in Life." Contributions are welcome! DM me with your funny story and I'll give you credit for it. {Highest Ranking: #250 in Humor as of 9/28/17}

Sixteen-year-old Sage Greene was locked in a maximum-security asylum for the criminally insane after murdering nearly 200 civilians. It isn't her, though - it's the voices. There are two sides to Sage: the normal, self-conscious teenager, and the Voice lurking inside her head, the one that forced her to strike out and kill. Now, both parts of Sage are being sent into space, destined for a new rehabilitation program upon Mars, with a group of the most dangerous teenagers in America. Before they can reach the red planet, however, they are abducted by a strange alien race and taken away from their spaceship and everything they have ever known to compete in a sadistic set of physical and mental tests nicknamed the Trials. And so far, nobody has survived the Trials. * {Highest ranking: #5 in science fiction as of 9/3/17} [Comment threads contain spoilers at random. You have been warned.] WARNING This is a very dark book that only spirals further down. Murder is discussed and there are slightly graphic scenes.

This is just getting ridiculous. // I'm going to make some changes to how these books are structured so we don't run through them so damn fast...There will be more "HIGHLIGHTS!" chapters to fit multiple funny things into one chapter. I will also be tagging people more since I've discovered that so many of the weird people IN these books have Wattpad accounts :) // You can read the first three books right on my profile, or you can delve into the "Weird Things I Heard in Life" series, which mainly follows my strange family around! Both can be found in a reading list on my profile or in the list of my works, obviously. // [#267 in Humor as of 5/10/18]

I can't believe that I'm doing another one of these. When does it end?? Well, here are some more completely screwed-up, completely true things I've heard people say... Feel free to contribute chapters :) *There is cussing so guard your baby eyes* [#145 in Humor as of 5/10/18]