Because life is still a beach. Accounts of the author's failed attempts at interpersonal interaction, part deux.

Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

Victor Hart the Carnie detective, haunted by his own soulessness uses secret mind control techniques to solve crimes in a steampunk alternate reality. Join him as he hunts after his arch nemesis; the dastardly clockmaster Geppetto.

In a Futurist-Victorian London, Ex-Carnie Victor Hart makes his living as a dinner party entertainer and mountebank, using the skills taught to him by his Romani mother – the Patterns. When tragedy strikes a wealthy friend, Victor Hart puts his skills to use in an alternative manner. This Steampunk London has its fair share of psychos, sickos, and sadists, and it takes a special kind of mind to hunt them. Victor sees human behaviour in a way few others can understand but only as an outsider; certain parts of his humanity are missing and that disturbs him. As he solves each seemingly unrelated case, a dark pattern slowly begins to reveal itself threatening the heart of the British Empire and even what we feel makes us human. A Steampunk-detective-noir, darker than most, the first volume features four thrilling cases; the first novel in a Duology.

Sasama ka ba sa ROAD TRIP kung sa bawat pagliko mo ay kamatayan? Walang PRENO ang katatakutan dito!