Help Center ✓

❝This is IKEA's help center speaking. How may I help you?❞ ❝My testicle is stuck.❞ © sonderingly

Eye Drops (#2)

"This is Westerden Optometrist. What are your symptoms?" "For starters, my eyesight has been super blurry and distorted, and this problem is starting to screw up seventeen-year-old life. Speaking of which, you sound kind of young for an optometrist. How old are you?" "Um, I don't think it'd be the greatest idea for th...

Snow Boots (#3)

"You've reached Westerden Ski Lodge, how may I be of assistance?" "Hey, can I rent some snow boots and skis? Maybe even a girlfriend, if you've got any in stock." "Awesome, do you want to order a life along with that? The gift wrapping's free of charge." "I'll take what I can get." ...

Waffle Cones (#1)

"Hello?" "Um, hey?" "Wait, you don't sound like my Aunt Kathy." "Unless I was miraculously converted into a member of the opposite gender and somehow related to whoever is on the other side of this call, then yeah. I'm not your Aunt Kathy." "Oh, shiitake mushrooms." ...

#WHATEVER

SHOOKT 1.0 Nora is a solid fangirl who managed to get her crush's cell number from her big brother (without him knowing). She texted him everyday, sending him encouraging messages and inspiring quotes from her favorite books and movies. Arch, the athlete that's currently dominating the UAAP Men's Basketball season...

The Cell Phone Swap

Keeley accidentally swaps cell phones with a rivaling high school's star quarterback. Unable to switch back until a week later, she must interact with the arrogant boy, passing along texts and voicemails. As she gets to know him better, she realizes there's more to him than sexual innuendos and egotistical comments. B...

Once Upon a Bathroom Stall

❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer review...

100 Voicemails

[You can now purchase 100 Voicemails' paperback on Amazon!] After a car accident, seventeen year old Steve Carlton, goes into a coma. When he does wake up after a few months, he suffers from temporary memory loss. During this time, he starts to go through his messages and voicemails on his cellphone, trying to get a...

Prank Call

Would you do a dare? Even if it means risking your ass from getting called the cops on or even roasted?...... ❝ Are you alone? ❞ ❝ What excuse you? ❞ Is that really the kind of question you would want to ask a girl? At night? At exactly 3:00 am? Especially Quinn Williams? I...

The Benefits of Sexting

SOON TO BE PUBLISHED BY W BY WATTPAD BOOKS! Danny's life gets turned upside down when she receives a mysterious sext from the school's notorious bad boy. ***** Danny Ashmore never imagined starting her senior year off with a broken heart and a pregn...