Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

A writer. A weird stranger. A lot of little conversations. An online understanding. Every night. 23:11.

(U Series #1) Para kay Chino Alejandro, the best thing about life is its simplicity. Panatag ang loob niyang nakakakain ang pamilya nila tatlong beses sa isang araw. Kampante na siyang nakakasama ang mga kaibigan sa klase at computer games. At masaya na siyang mas nagiging close na sila ng all-time crush niya. Rose petals. Humiga sa kalsada. Skateboard. Maghintay ng himala. Beers. Pagka-intimidate sa chandeliers. Unexpected drunk tattoos. Ang Mabuting Salita ni Deus. Paintings. Prayer meeting sa loob ng elevator. Checkered polo shirts. Spoken words. . . at mag-YOLO. When lots of craziness, belief contradictions, and spontaneous adventures intertwine with uncensored words, not supposed to have feelings and out of hand emotions - life can get a lil bit out of hand for Chino. It's about time to get out from his comfort box to think, decide and act. FAST. Before that one particular girl gets trap in the box she wants to get out from. Life can never be just that simple and that's the best thing about it.

(Seducing Drake Palma Book 2) "Hindi na ako magpapadala sa 'yo, Drake. You're just going to make me fall then smash me into pieces once again." It's been four years since Alys graduated from St. Claire's High. And by now, naka-move-on na siya mula sa first serious relationship niya no'ng high school. She now has a man who treats her like a princess, the man who has helped her pick up the pieces of her broken heart-si Tripp. Her feelings are secure and her life is full once again. Or so she thought. Ano ang gagawin niya ngayong siya naman ang hinahabol ng isang Drake Palma at hinihingan ng isa pang pagkakataon? Pilit iiwasan at tatakbuhan ni Alys si Drake. Pero masusubok ang kanyang tatag kung hanggang kailan niya mapaninindigan ang desisyon niyang to forget and let go of that once in a lifetime epic love.

"Drake Palma, humanda ka! I'm going to get you by hook or by crook!" Ito si Alys Perez, may pagka-loner, maingay, madalas bagsak ang grades sa klase, bigo sa pag-ibig, at may malaki siyang problema. Kasi naman, pumayag siyang gawin ang isang bagay na wala talaga siyang kahit anong experience. Ano ba naman ang alam niya sa pangse-seduce? At lalo na sa matalino, hot na hot, at super sungit na classmate pa niyang si Drake Palma?! Ah basta! Gagamitin niya ang lahat ng powers niya para maging "mission accomplished" sa challenge na ito. Hindi siya makapapayag na maging isa sa napakaraming babae sa school na naging brokenhearted dahil sa playboy na si Drake.

After being dumped by her boyfriend because 'she's too much of a prude,' straight-A student Dana Ferrer enlists the kissing tutorial services of the Good Kissers Inc., made up of the three campus heartthrobs. She chooses notorious Campus King, Andy Guzman, to tutor her, thinking she can ace their lessons and have her ex crawling back to her in no time. She soon realizes she's not immune to Andy's irresistible advances. Nor is Andy oblivious to Dana's charm, which reminds him of someone from his past. Will Dana and Andy break the rules and fall in love with each other? Or will Dana opt to play safe and choose someone else?

Pagmamahal? Kailan mo matatawag na pagmamahal ang nararamdaman mo? Kapag ba masaya ka tuwing kasama siya? Pero paano kapag yung kasiyahan na nadarama mo, unti unting napapalitan ng pagdududa? At paano kapag ang taong nagtulak sa'yo upang magduda ang maging dahilan para muli kang magmahal... para lamang masaktan muli? Apat na tao, isang pag ibig. Pagmamahal, o pagkamuhi. Isa lang sa dalawa. Book 1 - available in Wattpad. Book 2 - available in self-published book only. Book 3 - available in self-published book only

Ilang beses ba nating tinanong ang sarili natin kung mapapansin ba tayo ng mga taong mahal natin? Ilang beses ka ba magtatanong sa buong buhay mo? At ano sa tingin mo ang magiging sagot? "Mapapansin kaya ako? Ang pag-ibig ko? Ang katauhan ko? Mapapansin Kaya?" Paano kung hindi? Paano kung oo? Magkaiba ba ang gagawin mong desisyon o pareho lang? Mag-iiba ba ang pananaw mo o magpapatuloy ka lang sa kung anong alam mong constant? Umaatikabong fame laban sa umaatikabong pag-ibig.

Elevators. Airplanes. Palaman ng Sandwich. Yung feeling na papunta ka pa lang at excited ka pa lang sa pupuntahan mo. Yung feeling na palapit pa lang yung birthday mo. Yung feeling na palapit pa ang isa pang espesyal na araw. Yung feeling na ilang oras na lang ay pasko na. Yung feeling na tatlong araw na lang simula na ulit ng pasukan. Yung feeling na nasa gitna ka pa lang at di ka pa nakakarating. Yung feeling na malapit na pero hindi pa. Yun ang laging gusto ko. Yung nasa gitna pa lang. Yung nasa gitna ka ng dalawang bagay. Gitna ng isang building. Gitna ng langit at lupa. Gitna ng dalawang matatabang tinapay. Gitna ng byahe papuntang disneyland. Mas gusto ko yung feeling tuwing nagbabyahe kesa doon sa nakarating ka na. Mas gusto ko yung feeling na may inaantay ka kesa doon sa nandyan na. I always like the things in between. "You only like things in between, Coreen. You only like the chase... You only want me chasing after you. You don't want to decide... Pero pakiusap naman, magdesisyon ka na, kasi tao rin naman ako, nasasaktan. And you? I don't think nararamdaman mo yung sakit na nararamdaman ko... You are just too heartless."