❝This is IKEA's help center speaking. How may I help you?❞ ❝My testicle is stuck.❞ © sonderingly

Highest rank #1 in humor [30 chapters] The hermit Ryder Quin never thought that one day, her crush of three years now, the very handsome Aiden Caley, would suddenly want to be her friend. What's more, a stranger broke into her backyard one night, his face hidden underneath a hood, and ever since then he would show up at night and leave before midnight. The quiet and uninteresting life of hers, unexpectedly was thrown into chaos. Having an introverted personality, Ryder struggles to keep up with the very energetic Aiden. However, because of the lack of her social skills, all of Aiden's flirty remarks and hints miss the mark, leading to Ryder accidentally friendzoning her crush, all while trying to figure out who the stranger that meets her every night is. With the mystery of the stranger's identity and the awkward moments spent with Aiden pickling her mind and heart, Ryder realizes that she has been dragged into a whirl of feelings she has never experienced before.

In Elemental magic you can be one of four magic types; water, fire, earth, and air. The only problem is Violet is none of these things. Is she what they call a magic dud, or is she something rarer, more powerful, and more dangerous than anyone could have imagined!? Teasers, "Em, most girls sneak out for a boy, you sneak out for a unicorn." I began to cry as it reached for my face."No!" I screamed. "Please No!" I went to pull back the shower curtain, but some nagging thought in the back of my head stopped me. I didn't have a little brother, so why was there a little boy in my bathroom? I gulped and with shaking hands pulled back the shower curtain. "What!? How could that be!?" I yelled, and covered my hand with my mouth. Shouting wasn't such a good idea right at this moment. If someone heard us and came up here to investigate the noise we were making, they would find a boy and a girl, a bloody knife with both their finger prints on it, and a very very dead body. "Don't touch her!" he hissed and lunged at Henry. Running through the night wearing nothing but a flimsy hospital dress, while waving a dismembered hand in his hand, was a strangeness no regular person could hope to inspire to.

COMPLETE #1 in Fantasy #1 in Adventure #1 in Historical Fiction ---------- Sometimes, believing helps us to see truth. Other times, we need a little evidence to believe. But there is truth behind everything; every false manoeuvre, ever little lie...a small piece of truth is hidden. Just like truth is wound into legends too. Growing up best friend to the future King, Arabelle never really thought her life could go wrong. Whenever she wanted something, or needed something, she would get it. Then she lost her father at a young age and Arabelle was forced into a world of dresses, balls, and lies. Being a tomboy, Arabelle would have rather been out on her horse doing archery practice with her brothers. When Arabelle gets curious and sneaks into a forbidden area of the castle, she discovers a deadly secret: her bloodline is sacred, dating back to a legend surrounded by the one thing she knows not to be true. Unsure what to do, she gets caught up in a series of events that lead to her being hidden and whisked away from the only familiar place she knew. After making some unlikely allies, Arabelle sets off on a journey to find the legend of the last dragon egg. Fate has something big in store for her; will she be able to withstand the pressure of it all?There is one thing Arabelle needs to learn to survive this new place... Some things are more than a legend. ---------- © Isabella Espe 2013 - 2019 This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental. This work is unedited. Your patience and leniency towards any grammatical or spelling errors is requested while you read this story. This story was written in 2013, and the author knows there are a lot of errors in this work. Thank you for understanding. ---------- Credit to @Abyss-of-Crazy for the cover!

WARNING: CONTAINING AMOUNTS OF SASS PREVIOUSLY UNKNOWN TO MANKIND In the city of NYC--- Ok. Hold up. First of all, New York City. What, are ya gonna assume everyone here knows what NYC is? Anyway, this is about two people. I can almost hear you rolling your eyes. Another cliché teen fiction with a bad boy and a good girl? Nope. This is about superheroes. I can still hear you rolling your eyes. Superheroes. Like in comic books? Like people with super speed and mutant powers? Yes. But this isn't about the fight they have. More about the lives they lead without the masks. But just keep in mind, people who live in the world have all different skin colours. Do not assume my characters are of one unless I state them explicitly. and diversity is welcome here in my novel! Anyhow, back to the story. Ever wonder where supervillains go after their fight with the hero? What about the other side of the story? It's not like they sit in their lair cackling all day and planning how to kidnap reporters. What about the lives they lead? And instead of just focusing on that, what if the superhero and the supervillain knew each other? I mean, can they see behind the mask? No, so their identities are secret. So what if the hero and villain were best friends? What if they were roommates? What if they were falling for each other? And what happens when they find out? Now, I assume you know all of these questions will be answered in this book. But hold on. It's going to take a while. You're in for a bumpy ride. And if any of you got any of the references in this description, give yourself a pat on the back. That is a beautiful thing. And if you can name all the references in this book, you truly are a gift to mankind. Fangirl out.

If you're judging this book by its cover and title, you're already proving the point this story wants to make. Try to move past this satirical obstacle in front of you. This is a story about bullying, and like the hundreds of other books on the topic, it will show you the harsh reality of being discriminated, belittled, ridiculed for something you cannot control- how you look, who you love, or what you believe in. But unlike these books, this story's sole purpose is not to tear your heart out of your chest as you mourn over your loss of faith in humanity. Instead, this book will make you laugh and love alongside these characters. Just like in life, there will be moments of dread and surrender, but there will also be moments of happiness, laughter, and love. - Naomi Lorraine, better known as Nerdy Naomi with her thick-rimmed glasses and straight-A report card, is the most unpopular girl in her school. Even with the help of her sarcastic comebacks, that doesn't stop her from getting bullied by everyone in Dartwell High. Every day her childhood bully, Raymond Meyers, knocks her off her feet, literally. However, she can't do anything but survive the laughs, insults, and bruises high school gives her. There are three senior transfer students, dubbed the Three Musketeers: Bennett Frazier, Jordan Wallace, and Declan Lynch. All in one day, Naomi catches their attention one by one. With her snarky attitude, but innocent look, they can't help but want her. But not the way you're thinking. Oh no, not like that. Instead, it's probably the whole opposite. It's quite simple really. She'll be their good girl. And they'll be her bad boys. ~ [This story is a first draft written by a 13 to 15-year-old girl so it has its fair share of grammar mistakes and plot holes.] Wattys 2015 Talk of the Town Award Second Place Story of 2015 Best Humor and Overall Points of The Fiction Awards 2016 Third in the Writers Awards 2016 Highest Ranks: #1 Humor, #1 Teen Fiction

She was the type to stare herself in the mirror and see someone else stare back. Someone who was free and light, being able to spread her wings like an unbound angel. She was neither chained to Heaven nor Hell. Howbeit, no matter how far she reached into the mirror, she could never step through as her ball-and-chain presented itself in the form of a crown. She was a princess with two faces, desperately trying to have a sense of freedom outside of her royal obligations. She found it in the form of a weakness: a passion with another human being. Her love for him and ballet had kept her chin high; her crown not slipping from her pastel hair. So why, why did it suddenly become so hard when a gothic gymnastic back-flipped into her life? Why were her heartstrings being tugged on by someone of her same gender? Why was it suddenly so difficult, so strenuous to keep living in her pastel world when this mysterious girl brought such bright colours with her? TRIGGER WARNING: Mentions of sex, suicide and other mature themes will be contained within this book. Read at your own discretion.