Funny
10 stories
Kidnap My Heart by TheFlamingPopsicle
TheFlamingPopsicle
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Emma van der Bilt is clever, snarky, and spoiled rotten. William Knight is cocky, impatient, and slightly dimwitted. So how exactly did Will manage to kidnap Emma and her best friend twice and live to talk about it? *** "What the hell-" I screeched. "Good morning, sunshine." I looked up in alarm and saw the smirking face of my kidnapper. His face would have made me a lot angrier had it not been terribly swollen, thanks to yours truly. "I'd say good morning, but judging by the boner on your face, I'd say you weren't having such a good morning." His self-satisfied smirk fell almost instantly, and his partner-in-crime laughed out loud from the driver's seat. "Actually," he said, "I'm having a pretty good morning. My luck's about to change. You wanna know why?" I didn't answer. "I'll tell you why. I've successfully kidnapped the daughter of one of the richest men in the country." "Don't start counting your lucky stars just yet. This isn't over yet," I snapped. "Isn't it?" he asked, raising the eyebrow above his good eye. His other one remained in a permanent squint, and it made it kind of hard to take him seriously. "I'm not the one who's naked and tied up in a stranger's back seat." I glanced down at myself and noticed for the first time that I was in my bra and panties. Honestly, I was kind of relieved. When he'd said "naked," I'd assumed he meant birthday-suit naked, not half-naked. *** Warning: Rated PG-13 for sexual content and language. Mostly language. I have a colorful vocabulary.
The Replacement Girlfriend by AubreyEatsHearts
AubreyEatsHearts
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Chase Evans may be a notorious playboy, but he’s always known he’d fall hopelessly in love one day. So when he meets Spanish beauty LaCienega [Lah-cie-Ena-ga] Perez and falls head over, he knows for sure she’s what he’s always been waiting for. Except LaCienega is already engaged by the time he meets her and to none other than his childhood best friend Jace Waite who Chase hasn’t seen since high school graduation. Meanwhile, he meets Krislynn Reimer who has a strange attraction for bad boys and imperfection. She's not interested in the pretty boys who are complete jerks like he is. She wants the real bad boys, the ones with addiction problems, family problems, money problems, woman problems, any problems! It’s her favourite hobby to take them home and put a Band-Aid over their hearts and nurse them back to health. Except when they make a full recovery, they always abandon her and always in the cruellest ways. The two utterly can't stand each other so how in the world did Chase end up as Krislynn's boyfriend and how in the world did Krislynn end up as Chase's maid?
The Baby Project by DroppedJem
DroppedJem
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When it comes to seventeen-year-olds Aurora “Rory” West and Kale Mathews, there is no such thing as the concept of ‘common ground.’ Their interactions (the few that they have) are always filled with overly-sarcastic remarks and countless number of trips to the principal’s office. One day, when a particular interaction goes a bit too far, their principal decides to punish them with The Baby Project- a month long project, worth more than half their grade, that requires them to parent a fake baby. In the beginning, the partnership is discarded as a joke by both students. However, when threatened with the possibility of expulsion, Rory and Kale reluctantly agree to make peace for the sake of their education. Over time, something changes, making them question their thoughts and feelings. They say there's a thin line between love and hate, but will a baby be the last push? (Editing but still updating)
Better Than Revenge [Unedited - 2012 Version] by TheFlamingPopsicle
TheFlamingPopsicle
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Christian Ryder may be seen as a heartthrob by the majority of the world's female population, but to Sophia Hastings, he might as well be the newest addition to her hometown's local zoo. Sophia is a young, aspiring actress with big dreams who swears having to work with Christian Ryder wouldn't be worth all the fame in the world. Christian is a cocky womanizer whose world is turned upside down when he realizes his new leading lady just so happens to openly hate his guts. Is it even possible for Christian and Sophia to learn to get along long enough to make a movie, or will hatred, scandal and childish games destroy their careers? *** My eyes widened and I randomly exclaimed, "Oh, my God!" "What?" "Christian, thanks to you, I now understand what people mean when they say you're dark and handsome!" Christian looked smug. "I knew you would eventually." "They mean that when it's dark, you're handsome!" The smug look on his face disappeared. "I hate you." *** Contains some spoilers to Kidnap My Heart.
Lessons On Love by AubreyEatsHearts
AubreyEatsHearts
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“I’m going to get straight to the point. I want you to make me fall in love with you.” Camila Jones is fearless. She’s also uncontrollably fierce and overly ambitious which tends to be a bad combination. When she unexpectedly fails an audition due to her inability to express love, she’s forced to reconsider something she swore she would never do when she was a kid – fall in love. But where is a seventeen year old supposed to find a guy to fall in love with? Turns out, it might be a lot simpler than she thought.
My Best Friend is Back by BrittanyLeigh8
BrittanyLeigh8
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When Aiden left Bailey a year and a half ago she was just his shy nerdy best friend. They would spend every day together, tell each other their deepest secrets and vowed they’d never let anything come between them for as long as they lived. However Aiden’s sudden move changed all of that. Once Bailey realizes she no longer has her support system and can’t get by just being Aiden’s quiet little best friend anymore she knows it’s time for a change. And what better way to make a change than be the change. Away with those thick brown unnecessarily large glasses and braces and let’s not forget the baggy wardrobe and in with new stuff. After a complete makeover and change in social status Bailey is no longer that shy quiet girl. No she is the “it girl.” But can popularity and new clothes change who you were on the inside completely? According to Bailey though, she doesn’t even know that girl anymore so maybe it can. Life was pretty much perfect….well almost. How can be anymore when her best friend shows back up expecting to find the girl he’d left a couple of years ago? Now with Aiden in the same house next door that they grew up in and looking as good as ever it does nothing short of throwing her through a loop. How will this affect her new found status as Ms. Popular? And can she keep it up with Aiden back again? Who knows but he’s sure not gonna make it easy on her. Not when he wants back the girl he used to know.
Just My Type by BrittanyLeigh8
BrittanyLeigh8
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"Never Fall for a Bad Boy." That's what Olivia has always been told. So why did she go and do it anyway? And why did he have to be the best friend of her Best Friend's very own bad boy? This is something she never expected. When Olivia and Thomas first meet in home economics, she was a little more than surprised. She quickly learns that no matter what she does he's never gonna leave her alone. Why? Well, she doesn't even know the answer to that. When her best friend Farrah starts dating this bad boy's friend she knows that the countless run in's and unwanted conversations are inevitable and tries to find a way to not kill her self. Figuratively speaking of course. This is nothing compared to what she would go through. This bad boy has taken a genuine interest in her and it has nothing to do with her clumsiness in the kitchen. There is something about her that just draws him in. And as much as Olivia tries to fight the connection, she can never seem to erase him from her mind. Not that Thomas would even think about letting her anyway. Can Thomas convince her that maybe Bad Boy's are her type after all? ****Spin-off of The Bad Boy is Possessive. It is NOT necessary to read TBBIP to understand this book.****
How to Be Cliche (A Novel) by katrocks247
katrocks247
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Cli·ché: a phrase or opinion that is overused and betrays a lack of original thought. Meet Pepper Ballard. Independent, single, and sarcastic as hell. Pepper fights her own battles with pride and is officially #done with clichés. Unshaven werewolves, pale vampires, flawless and talented female vampire hunters who instantly fall in love with the enemy even though they want to kill the hunter's entire family... Please, give her a break. The more Pepper tries to avoid these nauseating clichés and destroy them, the further she is dragged into a dark, supernatural world that is her own virtual worst nightmare. A world that includes a bunch of sexy, mysterious, and dangerous men lurking around every corner... Wait...what's the definition of "nightmare" again? * * * My writing page! Please join! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Kat-aka-katrocks247-from-Wattpad/208740202517075
The Bachelor by greenwriter
greenwriter
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[PUBLISHED UNDER POP FICTION, AN IMPRINT OF SUMMIT MEDIA] One competition, one man, twenty-five women, and a bet. Zachary Astor wanted to be the Bachelor for one purpose alone: to prove to his friends that he can ditch twenty-five women without ever looking back at any of them. But will he stand on to his words when he meets Julianne Grey, the only woman who seems to regret being in the competition? Despite what he thinks, Zachary will find his thoughts preoccupied by the weird, silent, and mysterious girl he keeps on giving a rose much to his own amazement and her disappointment.
How Not To Write A Wattpad Story by AhmedTheSloth
AhmedTheSloth
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Penguins.