"say my name, dan howell"

Dan is different. He's learned to accept that. Well, as best he can anyway, considering he's never really had much of a choice. It's been this way for as long as he can remember, the constant runaround process of trying to feel normal. His life is built around it, trying to trick both himself and everyone he interacts with into seeing him as your average person. The isolation as he desperately tries to keep others from finding out, the bitterness that wells up inside of him each and every time he's reminded that he'll never be like everyone else, the fear that nothing will ever change. He's fated to be this way forever; a misfit from society. Isolation can only go so far though, so when he's struggling to make ends meet and he's faced with the option of looking into a serious job or taking on a roommate, he opts for what seems like the easier option at the time. It doesn't seem so easy ten failed roommates into the process, or when he sits down at a table to meet with prospect number eleven and ends up with a coffee spilled all over his lap. Potential roommate number eleven, Phil, turns out to be an insufferable optimistic ball of sunshine that Dan wants nothing to do with. His options are running out though, as are the savings he's been using to pay his rent, so he finds himself begrudgingly agreeing to let the other man move in. Neither of them have any way of knowing just what they've gotten themselves into as they shake on the matter, but time will tell.

Dan Howell has terrible night terrors that don't seem to be subsiding, but when his parents send him off to college in hopes that things get better for him, things only sadly, get horribly worse. *This fic is so cringe worthy. It's a huge mess. It also contains suicidal actions, alcohol abuse, bipolar disorder, guns, death, drugs, emotional abuse, and just lots of triggers so if you're sensitive to things like this, please find a better fic to read that is suitable for you and or read at your own risk. Note that I was 12 or 13 when I started writing this so please, give me a break. Also, SO MANY TYPOS, WYD SELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SECOND BOOK IN THE 'STAINED' SERIES After running away together, Dan and Phil live their life in London, keeping their past locked up. Either way, nothing has changed. In fact, things have gotten worse for the two boys. After Dan pulled the trigger on the gun, he hasn't been the same since. Dan and Phil are now the most wanted criminals in the UK for many things, but one crime strains their relationship forever last: murder. [rated R for language, violence and/or gore]

*'BEST SERIES' WINNER (FANFICTION AWARDS 2017)* FIRST BOOK IN THE 'STAINED' SERIES Meet Phil Lester, a bad boy with blood on his hands. Literally. After one night strikes, Phil turns to a group of serial killers as a distraction and soon he finds himself with a trail of dead bodies at his own fault. Meet Dan Howell, a shy boy with flowers in his hair and nail polish on his fingers. Friendless and full of anxiety, he remains alone, until said serial killer with tattoos and piercings sits right next to him in the same support group. Phil finds himself falling for Dan when his mission is to kill him, and he wants to get close, even if that means spilling the unwanted truth- and a bit of blood. (punk!phil meets pastel!dan) [rated R for language and violence/gore]