They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

[IN BOOKSTORES AND KINDLE UNLIMITED NOW!] What if you were matched with the original love god? --- When Lila goes to the Cupids Matchmaking Service it is to tell them to stop spamming her. Instead she finds out that cupids are real, she has been matched with a dangerous love god, and that he is coming to find her. Soon arrows fly, myths are awoken, and Lila finds herself part of a deadly supernatural war that could cost her her life, and her heart. Perfect for fans of Percy Jackson and the Vampire Diaries. --- THE PUBLISHED VERSION OF CUPID'S MATCH IS OUT NOW! READ IN KINDLE UNLIMITED! Get your copy of Cupid's Match at bit.ly/CupidsMatch or follow the link in my profile!

He's mythologically hot, a little bit wicked, almost 100% immortal. And he'll hit you right in the heart . . . --- Lila Black doesn't believe in matchmaking, let alone soul mates. So why is she constantly being hassled by the Cupids Matchmaking Service? But this gilded, cherub-bedecked dating agency isn't exactly what it seems . . . and it's about to turn Lila's entire world upside down. It turns out that Cupids Matchmaking is the real deal. As in, it's run by actual cupids―who don't look at all like they do in the paintings―and they have a serious problem with Lila's "match." Because this guy shouldn't be in the system. He shouldn't have a match. And while he's irresistibly hot, he's also incredibly dangerous. Because Lila's true love match is Cupid. The original bad boy of love. And he wants her. Now Lila's once-normal teenaged world has exploded into a mythological nightmare overrun by crime-lord sirens, wrathful cupid hit men, magic arrows that cause no end of trouble, and a mischievous, not-so-angelic love god she can't seem to stop herself from falling for . . .

| ranked #1 | | 4.24.16| | completed | | wattpad featured story 8/17/16 | | winner of a collectors edition WATTY 2016 | "How many times do I have to say this until you accept it? Those people are mine, those soldiers are mine, you are mine." I freeze. "Well," I straighten my spine, tightening my fists," I am not to be owned by anyone, least of all you. And my people aren't either. I will not allow you to do this." "You won't allow me to?" He scoffs. "And how are you going to stop me?" "If you do not call off this awful plan, I will reject you, as my mate." highest rank: 1

Book two 🖤 Avaryn Alastor thought she was a normal teen. Thought. But ever since she moved to Crestwood Academy her life had turned upside down. She had been thrust into a world of magic and deception. A world split between two species. Devara and Greer. The Devaras are beings of light and goodness. The Greer are beings of shadows and evil. And Avaryn just so happens to be both. And with being both she must pick a side. But how can she choose between her friends and a potential love? How can she choose between good and evil?