An eccentric comedy about space, and the Dipsh**s that end up in it. This hyper-self-aware comedy of stupid proportions centers around Captain William T Lawg (no relation) and his adventures as a guy who managed to afford a refitted soft-top icecream truck in space, in a universe where that's shockingly common. His trusty crew of valiant randos, Marley the tech-bro stoner spacebunny, Duffy the plump and sassy female mechanic, Roy the frigging fabulous Android, and also that other chick is there. Ride with the crew of the notorious Tast-E-Chill to a world of wonder that a lot of other space travelers have already been before, but probably not Lawg, so it's still exciting. with a crew of 3-5 and an IQ of also probably 3-5, The captain putters along to uncharted lands, where history, loot, drama, innuendos of the sexual verity, and various technicolor hoes shall surely be waiting, usually with some form of trap. Prepare yourself for shallow adventure, moderately offensive and overwhelmingly childish scenarios as the crew battle impossible odds, fierce enemies, lack of food and survival tape, and occasionally their own incompetence. Romance, Politics, Originality, this sucker has none of those, and it darn well knows it. raise the sails and grab the rails as a bunch of dipsh**s find themselves...IN SPACE. (Roll dramatic tapering credits, to royalty free trumpet music)

[COMPLETED] "Are you trying to get into my pants, Orion?" His eyes flash gold as he looks at me. "Yes." *** It's long since been told that the stars were story tellers. That the stars held knowledge that no one had. It was time for Maria to find out how true this really was. *** I suppose being forced to stay with a complete stranger sucks. It sucks even more when nothing makes sense. It doesn't help when I am stuck with an obnoxious, cocky and hot man. Orion. Even his name provoked a plethora of feelings. Nervousness. Dread. Wanting to shove a stick up his ass. Maybe even kiss his kissable lips. Orion. Just meeting him had been out of the norm. Then I was shoved. Shoved hard. Shoved into a world that causes my body to sweat and have goosebumps all over at the same time. A world that gave me things I never knew I wanted. A world I had yet to discover. Oh, it was time alright. Time to Render the world Starless. Cover by: @sofkisses

Wattys shortlist 2021 "I'm already loving this story" - _singforjoy_ "You are going to get me what I want," Isla said, calmly. "Or I will kill you." The words hung in the air between them. Raif looked unconcerned. "Is that so?" he said. Born to the captain of a pirate ship, Isla has spent her whole life at sea. Raised among sailors, her father has trained her to fight, command a crew, and, most importantly, the secrets of the ocean currents. When her father is killed in a storm, she is forced to step into his role as captain. Not only does she have to provide for the men on her ship, but she also inherits her father's outstanding debt to Lord Sutherland: the task of stealing the rare Serpent's Eye emerald. After months of failure to locate the emerald, Isla is forced to take extreme measures: she kidnaps Duke Raif Sayers, who knows of the emerald's location. But Raif proves to be more strong willed and stubborn than Isla expected. Matters become even more complicated when Raif's father offers a large reward for his son's rescue and suddenly every cutthroat is looking for Raif and the pirate who kidnapped him. As Isla and her crew are pushed to their limits and race against their deadline, Isla has to face that the one decision she thought would save her crew could be the very thing that destroys them. "Isla is such a kick-ass character that I can't help but to love her." - strawberrytrifles "This amazing book. I found it and fell in love" - sparklingdophlin333 "Isla is amazing, she is so strong willed and brave. I love her so much! She is already becoming one of my favourites 😍❤️" - theaxbank "Amazing. Your writing makes the setting, your characters and their actions leap off the page." - ADesignerofBeautiful "I am definitely seeing the Carter side of her now!😄" - notevenfunny_ A Loria Tale # 2 #1 Teen Fiction

Caleb Townsend has always hated Savannah Mayfield. Working on the Mayfield Estate, Caleb thinks she's just a small town pampered Princess... beautiful and rich, she's just too sweetly Southern for Caleb's liking. But then, things start to shift. Maybe Caleb had Savannah all wrong. Maybe she wasn't the Princess he always thought she was. Maybe he's even falling for her... one little moment at a time. A short story inspired by the song Little Moments by Brad Paisley.

"I have an idea." 😊 "Oh?" 😒 "You don't sound that interested in it." 😕 "That's because I'm not." 😒 *Growls * 😠 "Fine, what is your idea." 🙄 "Well, now that you asked, I want to make a book entirely made up of short stories. Hey! Don't leave! I think it could be really fun." 😄 "You think that?" 🤔 "Well, yeah! It's like mini episodes or short movies!" ☺ "If you say so." 🙄 "Will you please just support me on this?! You might be surprised at how much fun it is." 🙃 *Sighs and gestures onward* "Alright, lead the way." 😎 "Woohoo! This will be awesome!" 🤗😄

" Even if our love is forbidden, I want to protect you." An angel in love with a demon. A demon in love with an angel. A forbidden love that blooms unexpectedly between the two species. But what is the cost of their love? ----- I would like to add that this book is literally filled with cliches. It's SUPER cheesy, but still good!

Emma van der Bilt is clever, snarky, and spoiled rotten. William Knight is cocky, impatient, and slightly dimwitted. So how exactly did Will manage to kidnap Emma and her best friend twice and live to talk about it? *** "What the hell-" I screeched. "Good morning, sunshine." I looked up in alarm and saw the smirking face of my kidnapper. His face would have made me a lot angrier had it not been terribly swollen, thanks to yours truly. "I'd say good morning, but judging by the boner on your face, I'd say you weren't having such a good morning." His self-satisfied smirk fell almost instantly, and his partner-in-crime laughed out loud from the driver's seat. "Actually," he said, "I'm having a pretty good morning. My luck's about to change. You wanna know why?" I didn't answer. "I'll tell you why. I've successfully kidnapped the daughter of one of the richest men in the country." "Don't start counting your lucky stars just yet. This isn't over yet," I snapped. "Isn't it?" he asked, raising the eyebrow above his good eye. His other one remained in a permanent squint, and it made it kind of hard to take him seriously. "I'm not the one who's naked and tied up in a stranger's back seat." I glanced down at myself and noticed for the first time that I was in my bra and panties. Honestly, I was kind of relieved. When he'd said "naked," I'd assumed he meant birthday-suit naked, not half-naked. *** Warning: Rated PG-13 for sexual content and language. Mostly language. I have a colorful vocabulary.

"I'm soooo in love with this story!" - Seagull88 "Do the rumors intimidate you?" Edison asked. Kit chuckled. "There is something you should know about me, Edison Reigns," she said, climbing back onto her moped and giving him a steady look. "I'm not easily intimidated. I'm also not interested in your kind of fun. My kind of fun is pushing limits and hoping I'm around long enough to see the consequences. If you want someone to kiss, call Amanda Gleason. If you want adventures you'll never forget, come find me." Lighthouse Point was a sleepy southern town where life followed tradition and nothing broke the norm until Kit St James arrived. Sassy, flirty and mischievous, Kit is looking for adventure and someone to come along for the ride. When she teams up with Edison Reigns, someone who has his own reputation, life in Lighthouse Point will be anything but normal. Kit is determined to have a summer she'll never forget. Edison is determined to find out more about the girl behind all the rumors. A girl who lives in a house with no furniture. "IM ALREADY IN LOVE WITH THIS WHOLE BOOK" - TheBookLover1209 "wow that is one incredible book xxx"- maddiemaymoo "I'm loving this already, for goodness sake, you are just feeding my addiction!" - Bubblegum024 "Omg!! I siriusly love this book!!❤❤❤ - Gabbar2108 "Kit is so savage! ? Gosh, I love her! She's great!" - Flutterby_Drive "Oml I'm already in love with this story" - KJ_Dorvi "I thought Carter was bad but Kit is on another level!" - kxy_xoxo

* The Fiction Awards 2020 Winner * In Goodharts, the small town beyond the hills, nobody knows how Ferry Donovan looks. His mother has been keeping him out of sight for over nine years. When the boy finally begins school, the people are not only intrigued by his appearance but also by the strange things taking place around him. Yet, weird things are happening in Ferry's town, too. Every seven years, a person mysteriously disappears into the forest nearby. When one of his classmates vanishes into thin air, Ferry is determined to find him. With the help of his friends, who are just as different, he embarks on a journey into the Land of the Unseen. But is he really prepared for what lies beyond? Highest Rankings: # 1 in Fantasy, # 1 in Adventure, # 1 in Mystery, # 1 in Action, # 1 in Magic, # 1 in Middlegrade IMPORTANT: This book has been stolen from Wattpad multiple times and uploaded on Amazon and other websites for sale WITHOUT my permission. If you see this book or the content of this book on any other website other than Wattpad, please let me know ASAP. Thank you!