in a world where your moods are visible above your head, displayed through pictures and icons, it's impossible to hide your true feelings. however dan howell seems to be lacking this. labelled as an emotionless freak, dan is outcasted because his moods are never visible. that is, until an endlessly happy boy named phil wonders why.

Gerard is barely surviving until a new neighbor moves in next door, and for the first time in ages, Gerard finds himself with a friend that isn't his little brother. Gerard never imagined that one beautiful boy could change everything for him, but he can't ignore the way Frank makes him feel, or the improvements he has seen in himself. Gerard is aware that he is falling in love with Frank even though he knows it is wrong...he is seventeen while Frank is only thirteen. But he can't deny his feelings no matter the consequences. ~~~ *trigger warning for bullying, self harm, drinking, suicidal thoughts and actions, terminal illness, and character deaths* Completed

It's the lake in November, and the move closer to the ocean, and Gerard's fixation, and Gerard's compulsions like tidal waves dragging him down, and Mikey's more distant than ever: like they're drifting out into the middle of the ocean, whereas Gerard's just stuck there: water turning to quicksand around him, drowning. And it's the letter; Frank finds it on the floor of the boys' bathroom on the first floor. It's dropped in accident, perhaps from a pocket or something, and it's drenched in what Frank hopes is tap water, and the words: scrawled in blue ink are difficult to make out as the words join together in a fuzzy inky mess. The only paragraph legible is the final one, and even still, it barely is: 'I've been underwater for a long time now, but I'm not drowning, I'm beginning to think I can breathe like this, but I can't, I'm gasping for breath, and I have to do this, Mikey, I have to end this myself. I'm going to the lake on the 1st of November, don't wait for me... I'm not coming back.' And the name signed at the bottom is little more than a smudged mess of blue ink, and there's nothing Frank can do about it, but he knows for certain that the one thing he can't do is ignore this letter, and he reminds himself of that as he folds it into his pocket. It's a suicide note, Frank's stupid, but not stupid enough to brush over that fact, and whoever this person is, Frank knows that they most certainly don't deserve to die. And Frank isn't going to let them. Because he's going to find this person; he's got time now at least, and he can save them, he will save them - Frank promises himself that. But one person in a whole school, it's like a needle in a haystack, but he's got time, it's November 1st in thirty days, and he can only hope that it will be enough. He's got one month: the date is October 1st.