Part 1 of the infamous series. Feelings appear. Sparks fly. Love rises. Problems occur. Please note: This story is now very old (7 years old in 2020) and I'd like to think my writing has improved since then! There are a bunch of cringey parts and bad writing in here, but enjoy and thanks for reading! :)

In which Phil meets an odd boy on an online chatting site.

in a world where your moods are visible above your head, displayed through pictures and icons, it's impossible to hide your true feelings. however dan howell seems to be lacking this. labelled as an emotionless freak, dan is outcasted because his moods are never visible. that is, until an endlessly happy boy named phil wonders why.

❝I wish I could have told you that, Dan.❞ - Phil Lester grew up. Dan Howell didn't have the chance to, well, in Phil's eyes, anyway. Phil finds himself with a lot of time alone, and so he sits down with a pen and caramel macchiato and reminisces on days on the Manchester Eye, the sofa at Starbucks and walks through abandoned hospitals. - A My Chemical Romance inspired fan fiction, taking place when Phil doesn't have Dan.

Dan Howell secretly loves Phil Lester. Phil Lester secretly loves Dan Howell. Dan Howell is bullied. Phil Lester is best friends with Dan's bully. Dan Howell wants to die. Phil Lester is too afraid to stop him.

" we're friends right? well, you can't really tell me otherwise anyway, which is probably why we're friends. " Or the story of an overenthusiastic boy called Phil, who has trouble shutting up, and a reluctantly mute boy called Dan, who's life is falling apart, and how they both come to realise that sometimes - actions can speak louder than words.

" Phil Lester is on the edge of suicide. " or in which Dan can see everyone's deepest secret simply by looking at them.

11:11pm "I wish my my life was easier. I wish I was happy. I wish my dad wasn't so mean. I wish my mom was still alive.-" 11:12pm "-I wish Philip Michael Lester loved me back." [Dans life was horrid. But he tried not to let it show at school. Read about dans journey about him overcoming his life problems and falling in love with a straight boy named Phil Lester.] WARNING: Triggering Self harm Smut Boyxboy Side pairings (kickthestickz, phinzie, etc) !!!!!!!THIS IS A PHAN BOOK SO IF DAN AND PHIL dATE SOMEONE ELSE IT IS NOT PERMANENT!!!!!!!!!

"Phil... I'm depressed" "Oh my god, me too! I get so down in the dumps sometimes it's ju-" "No. Phil. I have depression" "Oh." ~ triggers: -self harm (cutting) -depression + depressing thoughts -suicidal thoughts + suicide -gay slurs + other derogatory words -abuse -alcohol addiction -rape -murder ~ #144 in Fanfiction ~ completed - 25/9/16

[completed] philly: who's this? danhowell: your future husband ; copyright © 2016 //highest ranking: #4