❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer reviews? How many stars out of five?❞ ❝What are yo- oh my god, I'm going to fucking kill Marie.❞ (alternatively called: a lot of people shit with pens) written in dialogue // cover by xhemmingshugsx

When life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. When your brother throws you a wig, you wear it. Vivian and Sawyer King are twins. They were a team and the only family they ever needed. But a new town changes their comfortable dynamic. As Sawyer is compelled to slip out of his new school, because of his needy girlfriends he seeks the help of his sister. When Sawyer asks his twin sister to pose as him, Vivian finds herself in a tight situation. Soon, Sawyer welcomes Vivian to the world of 'Dude'; where football, girls, and Bros are all included. But being your brother isn't an easy task. Vivian finds herself in awkward encounters, drunken mishaps, and in the company of many...many love triangles. Add a couple oblivious parents, a virginator, a double life, a group of kids known as the Intimidation Nation, and two boys vying for your affection, and you have Vivian's not so normal life. ||BEST RANKING: #1 IN HUMOR|| ||BEST RANKING: #5 IN FUNNY|| ||BEST RANKING: #83 IN TEEN FICTION ||

I gots the best jokes around even better than a clown. You think you got better ones; you'd better think twice, hon. Check out this book, read it all day and soon you will be laughing all of the way. I hope you enjoy, all you girls and boys, so take a deep breath and I hope that you enjoy your death! Also, read each chapter once a day just to see if you laugh.