in which a boy is turned on by testosterone, and valentine's day is celebrated a #taygetsthegay one shot [special mention yay]

Summer Jacobs knew full well about her town’s tradition. Every year at the end of the summer, a party would be held on school grounds without the knowledge of the parents or the teachers. It had been happening since before Summer was born and never once was anyone the wiser. This year however, everyone was going to find out. Summer had planned a weekend of alcohol, bad decisions and horrendous photo’s which she would later un-tag herself from on Facebook. A whole weekend with her friends at the biggest party of the year, without any worries or parents telling her what to do. So how she ended up trapped in the school with a deranged psycho killing her classmates off one by one, she will never know. It wouldn’t have been as bad if she was trapped on her own. She would have been happier to face the lunatic solo rather than be trapped with a guy who kept using the life or death situation to make passes at her. His theory was being so close to death should definitely loosen her up, and by ‘loosen up’ he definitely meant ‘get naked.’ Along with his friends who between them had the IQ of a baby tree stump, an outcast who probably still had Spiderman bed sheets and the cheerleaders who were more worried about all the blood staining their new white jeans, they had to somehow make it out of there alive. And to think, Summer’s biggest worry that weekend was waking up with a brutal hangover… ©makeandoffer

They're worlds apart, and this isn't high school, so how the hell did a homeless female writer end up renting a billionaire's mansion? And - hold your breath - becoming his fake girlfriend? ➳ full blurb inside ➳ first reached #1 in humor on july 6, 2015 ➳ first reached #1 in business on august 29, 2023 ➳ winner of best humor book in the fiction awards 2016 ➳ featured by cadbury (marvellous creations) and secret lives of the americans (pivot) P.S. This is a SATIRICAL BILDUNGSROMAN. Proceed with caution. (cover by @glueeater)

bal-co-nee-al ; of or referring to a balcony \\ in which a cynical girl and a disastrously (self-characterized) aromantic psychology student have daily discussions between neighbouring balconies \\ #1 in short story june & july 2k15 \\ book 1

In which Beckham Lenox, a battered Quebecois who somehow wound up in New York, aspires to navigate the inner workings of everyone's mind but his own. {under mild construction.}

NOW AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE ON AMAZON AND BARNES&NOBLE! THIS IS A SAMPLE OF THE PUBLISHED BOOK. _____________________________ Livvie Jefferson is lame. If it weren't for the secret list of crazy things she'd like to do, she'd be less interesting than a piece of stale bread. Harvey Lockwell is a God. An unattainable God. Livvie's content with staring Harvey down from afar and wiping the drool from her chin, until everything changes when she's forced to have actual contact with him during their after-school tutoring seasons. In a cringe-worthy chain of events, Livvie's boring life turns into a catastrophic mess when Harvey ends up finding her secret list. Things take another turn for the worse when Livvie accidentally runs away from home while on a high-speed chase straddled to the back of Harvey's motorcycle. Not only does she have to endure the embarrassment from being caught with a bucket list at the ripe age of seventeen that includes losing her virginity, but she also has to figure out exactly what Harvey ended up doing that caused them to be chased out of town by a band of criminals and how to fix it. Crazy house parties, grungy motel rooms, unexpected make-out sessions, bad dancing, and a scandalous twist are just the beginning. For a girl who's never done anything remotely exciting, Livvie Jefferson is in for some pretty bad things.

Gangs. That was the one thing that had ruined Evelyn Summers life since the start. With her brother being the leader of “The London's Eyes,”growing up in a world of cruelty was something Evelyn Summers had to become accustomed to. But thing's about to get a whole lot worse. Gangs are starting to form all over London- with the intention of destroying London's Eyes. What will happen when the leader of the most powerful gang offers protection in exchange for Evie? Will Evie be able to survive Sebastian King? She just might have to- because as we all know, Sebastian isn't planning on letting her go any time soon. +++++ Our breaths were heavy and ragged, our chests skimming against each other. "You're no good for me." I whispered, my eyes searching his emotionless ones. "Well that's just too bad, now is it?" +++++

❝ Wait," I say, backing away. "Let me get this straight- you're Santa Clause?" I stare at the boy no more than a couple years older than me. He had to be kidding. He rolls his eyes, his handsome face illuminated by the lights on the tree. "Well when you put it that way, I suppose." The candy cane i am sucking on falls from my lips, clattering to the floor. "B-But where's the beard, the overflowing fat and the HO HO HO?" He snorts, a charming smile on his lips as he tugs on the end of my Santa hat. "Sweetheart, it's all just the Santa Clause Act.❞ ~*~ p.s. The current cover was made by Isasecret Ranking: short story #9/ Teen Fiction: #56

Leah Preston was a normal 17 year old girl, until she wakes up and finds herself staring at her own lifeless body. She has no idea what happened to her or how she died, and the only person who can see her is her sworn enemy Jared. Neither of them have a choice, they must put their differences aside in order to find out what really happened to Leah and how she died, or better yet, who killed her, while at the same time fighting each other and the feelings they are beginning to develop. ©makeandoffer

[This book has officially been published and only a sample remains. See inside for details.] Nora Montgomery's primary goal was to remain seemingly unnoticed until graduation, and that meant staying away from Ryder Collins. But when both she and Ryder are selected to participate in the local police department's handcuff demonstration, they find themselves inescapably chained together. The tension between them is thick; filled with unresolved issues from their past friendship. But things get a whole lot worse when the officer loses the key and the pair are forced to accommodate each other until a replacement is available. Being handcuffed to the opposite gender was sure to introduce some extremely uncomfortable situations. Things are about to get awkward, right? 2013 Watty Awards Winner Most Popular, Mystery//Thriller