The story of my life.

where two famous youtubers deal with stolen cars, crazy girlfriends and their crazy fathers, movies, tea parties, traveling, and quite possibly, falling in love.

What hurts the most is that the memories I used to hold so close to me, are now the memories I wish I could forget.. for the rest of my life..

One bridge. Two guys. Three secrets. Four therapists. Five attempts. Six months. Seven bad habits. Eight family meetings. Nine visits. Ten cuts. One death. Spiritual #4

Why did I have to fall for Louis? He's a total nightmare to begin with, we drive each other completely insane. I hate how my entire life now revolves around him, and the fact that he's my next door neighbour probably doesn't help anything.

"I wanted so badly to lie down next to her on the couch and sleep. Not [F], like in those stupid movies, not even intercourse. Just sleep together, in the most innocent use of the phrase. But I lacked the courage and she had a boyfriend, I was gawky and she was gorgeous, I was hopelessly boring as she was endlessly fascinating. So I walked back to my room and collapsed on my bed, thinking that if people were the rain, I was a drizzle, and she was a hurricane." -Louis Tomlinson. {Quoted/Idea from Looking For Alaska.}

I guess I don't know where everything went so wrong. Everything was perfect before, sure it has been a rocky couple of months, but then again nothing about my life was not rocky. I guess I just thought he was different. You know? But like I said everything is just different. Everything is different now.

The girl who smiles and laughs all day is the girl who wants to end her life, the girl that spends endless nights crying herself to sleep. The girl is smiling, but look deep into her eyes, is she really happy? When no one is looking her smiles turn into tears. A smile on her lips, and cuts on her hips. It's scary what a smile can hide, isn't it? Her name was Ellison, she was, on the outside at least, normal, a seemingly happy girl. She laughed with her friends, and smiled all day, but no one knew of the suicidal fears and thoughts that lurked in the depths of her brain. No one knew her story like I do, no one loved her like I did. And I wish that I could have saved her. But one day, she tried to die, and a better place she did find. Broken roads severed in two are what tore us all apart, all we wanted to know was why she so desperately wanted to go.