Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

Did you read that title? This is a rant book. Please, if you want to read an actual story, there are real ones on this site, I promise you, some are even on my page! Stalk my reading list! This is just a collection of my random ramblings and pesky problems (did you notice that awesome alliteration?) that you may or may not relate to. Sorry, in advance, I hope you find them somewhat entertaining.

Sam is the most promising swordsman among this year’s crop of Paladin trainees...and knows it. Brash, cocky, and unbeatable with a sword (well, almost), Sam is the kingdom of Thule’s best hope against the violence wrought by demons. The only problem is that Sam is really Lady Samantha, daughter of the seventeenth Duke of Haywood, and if her father has his way, she’ll be marrying a Paladin, not becoming one. But Sam has never held much interest in playing damsel-in-distress, and so she rescues herself from a lifetime of boredom and matrimonial drudgery. Pity that Tristan Lyons, the Paladin assigned to train her, is none other than the hero of her childhood. He hasn’t recognized her as Lady Samantha--yet-- but if he does, he’ll take away her sword and send her packing. Sam is not the only trainee hiding secrets: Braeden is a half-demon with a dark past that might be unforgivable. Sam, Braeden and Tristan set out for the western coast, charged with rooting out an infestation of demons that has made the West unlivable. As they travel, they uncover a deep-seated corruption of power that threatens to derail everything they stand for. Rebellion stirs, led by a rival faction of warriors who tempt Sam to join them with an irresistible offer. A war between men is coming, and Sam must pick a side. Will saving the kingdom cost her life -- or just her heart? Reminiscent of Mulan, but with a medieval fantasy twist, Paladin is a tale of adventure, action, and romance.

"You're beautiful," I wrote quickly, handing her the cup.

First time writing please tell me if I should continue or if I'm just wasting my time :)

Wey hey it's Sniall. Ask me anything you want and I will answer.

Two years have passed since Riley first burst into the music industry with the hidden identity of, The Masked Singer. With two albums under her belt and a third one on the way, Riley supposedly has her pathway marked out. No tours are planned, no interviews, but two weeks of freedom before the whirlwind of recording process starts for her third album. Riley returns to the colourful city of New York to plan her outfit for the music awards. But when she bumps into Nathan, the world has given her a second chance to set the record straight and clear up the Masked Truth. But what happens when she's pitted at a crossroad for her life. Alex or Nathan? Sienna or Riley? The truth will set her free, but will the jump keep her from flying?

"By winter's cold and moon's blessed light, come Messenger. I offer a soul unto you" She is known as Death's messenger, the elusive Raven that collects the souls of the deceased. The reckless ancients, seeking the key to eternal life, released Her and unleashed the apocalypse caused by Her insatiable hunger for death. To fix their mistake, She was sealed and imprisoned, but her influence remained, leaving the world dreary, grey, and devoid of hope. Death is feared so much, that to even mention it is a crime. Do so, and you are considered to have allied yourself with the darkness that ruined the world. Helena is one such person, locked in a cell for predicting the deaths of others. Many people think her insane and others believe her to be closely connected with the Raven. Kaden, the newest guard in the prison stationed outside her cell soon learns she is not what she appears to be. She can heal wounds and is innocent to the dangers of the world beyond the stone walls. Meanwhile, Cristine, a talented assassin, does what she must to survive while having to answer to a zealous man who wants to unravel ancient secrets. After pushing him to his last nerve, she is forced to chase these secrets and ends up getting more than she bargained for. Soon they will be swept into a rebellion and legends made real. Assassins, corruption, and the mysterious Raven...

Christian Ryder may be seen as a heartthrob by the majority of the world's female population, but to Sophia Hastings, he might as well be the newest addition to her hometown's local zoo. Sophia is a young, aspiring actress with big dreams who swears having to work with Christian Ryder wouldn't be worth all the fame in the world. Christian is a cocky womanizer whose world is turned upside down when he realizes his new leading lady just so happens to openly hate his guts. Is it even possible for Christian and Sophia to learn to get along long enough to make a movie, or will hatred, scandal and childish games destroy their careers? *** My eyes widened and I randomly exclaimed, "Oh, my God!" "What?" "Christian, thanks to you, I now understand what people mean when they say you're dark and handsome!" Christian looked smug. "I knew you would eventually." "They mean that when it's dark, you're handsome!" The smug look on his face disappeared. "I hate you." *** Contains some spoilers to Kidnap My Heart.

"His mother's screams remained etched in his mind. He promised himself that night he would never again stand by as people he cared for suffered, and he would one day kill Volcseck. He intended to keep those promises." Falcon Hyatt has a problem. For reasons unknown to him he can wield all the elements, not only basics like fire and water, but also those more advanced, like space and poison. And now the chaos element, the same one his parents' killer Shal-Volcseck wields, has awakened within him, with catastrophic results. To complicate matters, the Suteckh Empire has declared war on the capital cities of Va'siel. Now he must venture out into the world with his friends Lao, Faith, and Aya on a mission to stop the Suteckh from taking over Va'siel, and find his parents killer, as all the while he struggles to suppress his newfound abilities. In his quest Falcon is forced to question what he's really fighting for, where his loyalties lie, and his own character. Is he truly a good person, or an even more dangerous menace than the dreaded Shal-Volcseck? Element Wielder is the story of faith, love, and a young man's struggle to continue on his quest, when surrendering to his emotions and giving up is so much easier.