Sixth year Slytherin, Dan Howell is unconditionally in love with adorable Hufflepuff Phil. Unsure whether to trust his instincts and confess his true feelings he tries to deny the way he really feels. But all it's causing is confusion. Will Phil manage to understand Dan's intentions and will Dan finally accept his adoration?

*'BEST SERIES' WINNER (FANFICTION AWARDS 2017)* FIRST BOOK IN THE 'STAINED' SERIES Meet Phil Lester, a bad boy with blood on his hands. Literally. After one night strikes, Phil turns to a group of serial killers as a distraction and soon he finds himself with a trail of dead bodies at his own fault. Meet Dan Howell, a shy boy with flowers in his hair and nail polish on his fingers. Friendless and full of anxiety, he remains alone, until said serial killer with tattoos and piercings sits right next to him in the same support group. Phil finds himself falling for Dan when his mission is to kill him, and he wants to get close, even if that means spilling the unwanted truth- and a bit of blood. (punk!phil meets pastel!dan) [rated R for language and violence/gore]

*'BEST PHANFICTION' WINNER (FANFICTION AWARDS 2018)* Daniel has anxiety and crumples paper to calm himself down. Phil has ADHD and diminishes hearts to bring himself up.

Dan Howell was the typical spoiled, rich boy with butlers driving him to operas and maids making him nachos for breakfast. Phil Lester, however, was the opposite. Barely any money and deadbeat parents, he lives in a bad neighborhood in a gross apartment with cat hair covering the carpet and an odd roommate. And then Dan's parents decide he needs to love someone rather than himself, and when Phil shows up at his mansion steps, Dan's parents grow fond of him- so much that the two are exchanging rings and Phil is moving in with his new spouse. They tell Dan he should give it a few months, to be patient, and if he still doesn't like him then they'll sign the divorce papers and call it quits. Marriage isn't perfect, right? Well this one is the exact example. But they could always pretend.

Years after his boyfriend's disappearance, Dan has been living alone, moping by himself and refusing to go out. He never gets any visitors, until one night there's a knock at his door, and he opens it to reveal someone he thought he'd never see again: his not-so-missing boyfriend, Phil Lester. Dan struggles to grasp the reality that his boyfriend really is alive, but everything is so different now. Should he throw his arms around Phil, or question what really happened?

"The less you care, the happier you are." He turned to face me, his blue eyes dull with traces of betrayal. "No. The less you care, the lonelier you are." - In a world where people have the ability to flip an emotions switch, many people lack feelings and sympathy in general- including Dan Howell after a tragedy strikes and he can't take it. However, he meets Phil Lester, the outgoing flirt with too big of a heart to handle. The two become close, and Dan soon realizes that even with his switch off, he can't deny that Phil is slowly reaching to turn it back on, and Dan can't seem to push his hand away.

"'I miss you.' 'What do you mean? I'm right here.' He shook his head. 'No, I mean I miss seeing you. I miss your smile. Seeing you smile made me so happy. I'm still so upset that I'll never see it again.' I breathed in, a bit shaky. 'You've just got to remember that if I'm with you, I'm always smiling, okay?' 'I still miss seeing you. If I could have just one opportunity to be able to see again, even just for a moment, I would spend my time just watching you smile. That's all I would want....'" After a horrible accident, Phil loses his sight and goes completely blind. Dan's help has been amazing to get him through it, but Dan can't help falling in love with his best friend - now in daily need of his care and attention. This story is about love and trust, and how two friends - much more than friends - overcome the odds of a disability, and how they realize that no matter how difficult it gets, they will always have each other. (Warnings: none! :D Fluffy, a little dash of angst, looong)

dan howell, nothing but a fuck up student and son. he knows the voices get the better of him, or does it? another voice comes, but this one is real. hes called phil lester. does phils voice change the thoughts of dan? or make it worse? ~ triggers : self harm, suicide, blood, anxiety & nervous breakdowns au's : depressed, high school (mainly adult life) boyxboy

**TRIGGER WARNING: SELF HARM, ABUSE, etc*** COMPLETED 10/12/16 Dan walks into class one day with a black eye, a burst lip and bruises and cuts up his arm. What is he hiding from Phil?

{I lost him a while back, but I didn't realise until it was too late. Until he was gone for good.} TW for depression, suicide, and lots of existentialism.