Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

"Who are you?" the supervillain asks. His breathless voice is surprisingly soft. I slam my hands on either side of him, leaning in so close my nose touches his mask. I'm the taller one. "It's 'Please Don't Kick My Sorry Butt,' but you can call me 'Too late, I Already Did.' " And I have to admit, that one I'm a little too proud of. ***Hey, hey! Now a Wattpad featured story!*** The superheroes are gone. For as long as Monet can remember, a league of superheroes has guarded her city. They were the citizens' idols, guardians, and best friends. Then, only months ago, those same heroes poofed, leaving the population at the mercy of a supervillain known as 'Masquerade.' As teen reporter and self-proclaimed defender of truth, justice, and the American way, Monet Jackson vows to do anything to find the heroes. And that "anything," unfortunately, includes taking a dip in a vat of toxic chemicals, being fired, and being hunted by Masquerade himself. But someone's gotta protect the city, and she might as well write a blog about it. *** WHAT'S INSIDE: 1 Kick-butt heroine +1 Love Triangle... or ...Love Quadrilateral... or... Love Dodecahedron +School Drama +Action Sequences +Too Many Puns +Plot Twists + Cliffhangers *** COMPLETE

How do you solve a murder when every single suspect has a time machine? Time-travelling police officer Erik Midgard has a problem. He has seen his own future. His fate is set. There is no way out. There is nothing he can do to escape it. He is going to die. But in the meantime, he has a murder to solve. On the moons of Mars, 900 years into the future, the wealthiest men and women in the solar system are arriving for the biggest night in the social calendar. The invitations are exclusively for people rich enough to own their own time machines. It is meant to be the greatest party in history. No one is supposed to die there. But when the guest of honour is found dead after the last dance, Erik and his partner Mirabi find themselves facing the greatest challenge of their careers. Trapped in a luxurious mansion and surrounded by millionaires, lovers, enemies, assassins, terrorists, robot doubles, hidden grudges, secret agendas and a criminal genius plotting his masterpiece, Erik and Mirabi must solve the case before its consequences can explode across the solar system. But as they sift through the evidence and the details of the crime start to appear, Erik finds himself beginning to wonder. Is his destiny truly written in stone? Or could there be a way for him to change it? A Wattpad Featured Book Selected by the BBC for their official Doctor Who reading list.

**A WATTPAD FEATURED STORY** "I'll paint you the sky, the trees, and all the things in between." In which a girl gives a blind boy colors. (C) titanically- (Micah Good) h i g h e s t: #73 in Short Story Wattpad Featured in Short Story 10/12/17