BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC by WhatMurdah "In my humble opinion there's only three things that men should be and that is bloody, slutty, and pathetic." And, on a good day, Draco Malfoy can be all three. When war heroine Hermione Granger and Azkaban-tattooed war criminal Draco Malfoy are forced to wed as part of Shacklebolt's controversial Reconciliation Act, they openly fight the match and each other-their public brawls breathlessly reported by the press. Secretly, a deeply traumatized Draco delights in Hermione's attention and pines for a real marriage with her-even as her forced proximity to the Black family magic irritates the cursed scar Bellatrix left on her arm, reminding her why she can never truly trust or forgive him. Then Hermione discovers that Draco's blood will soothe the scar . . . and Draco is willing to trade his blood for her body. (With post-war blood purity politics, black market potioneers, Pansy Parkinson's career advice, the Malfoys blackmailing Hermione's Wizengamot opposition, BDE Neville Longbottom hunting Death Eaters, a slutty Theo Nott serving as Draco's right-hand man, and Crookshanks loose in Malfoy Manor.) NOTE: this is not my work i just know people like reading it here better than ao3

Draco Malfoy really hates Hermione Granger. Everything he gives two fucks about is entirely contingent on the decisions that she makes and she doesn't even know it. If he's not careful, she's going to fuck it up for the both of them and then they'll all wind up dead. He never thought his life would depend on having to get between her legs and into her head. _____________________________________________ "I should have known," he said, "It's always the good girls who like it rough. Do you like it rough, Granger? Be honest," he purred into her ear, his left hand rising to wrap itself around her throat as he continued to press his right hand up against her, "I really don't like liars." con•tin•gent: subject to chance; dependent on [all rights go to jkr yuck] [not appropriate for audiences under the age of 18]

Hermione bursts into the room out of breath staring at the couple about to see say their vows. " Any objections to the unity of Draco Malfoy and Astoria Greengrass." Hermione slowly whispered in a barley audible voice while slowly raising her hand. " I-I am in love with the groom"

Both running from failing relationships, Draco and Hermione's paths cross in the most unexpected of places and after a small accident occurs, they both realise how much time has changed them. Leaving their pasts behind them, they embark on a new journey together but with many other obstacles standing in their way, will they ever get a chance to be the new people they so desperately want to be?

Draco and Hermione find themselves in a very unfortunate situation, one where they'll be forced to trust one another with their deepest secrets. Because how does a relationship between enemies change when they have full access to each other's mind? When they discover each other's darkest secrets? And how will they be able to use it as their advantage? Cover by: @FRUMPOLOGIST on tumblr

COMPLETE. MATURE THEMES! Not recommended for those under 18! Hermione Granger has been elected Minister of Magic, something she aspired to since school. Her life looks perfect - perfect famous husband, two kids, an extended family that supports her in every way, a great career, influential friends. Just what the heroine of Hogwarts deserves. But her life is not as perfect as it looks on the outside. She is missing something, something she hasn't had for a very long time. Who would be the one to fill this whole, none other than a certain ferret.

Hermione is the resident good girl of the Gryffindor House. Yet, she has some secrets not even her best friends know. Find out what that secret is as it unfolds to the rest of Hogwarts. Based off of a 2-part one shot from my other work: Dramione One-Shots.

When Ron breaks up with Hermione 5 years after the war has ended. A chance run in with Draco Malfoy will change everything. Can Hermione trust him? Can she love him?

Set in sixth year. One late night, hate turns to lust. Not written by me!! Written by the wonderful @AkashaTheKitty on AO3! :)