When Alex dies John is completely heartbroken, shutting people out and hardly taking care of himself. One day John finds the small purple journal he bought Alex all those years ago. He thinks this might bring him some comfort, boy was he wrong.

Alexander and John were best friends since the beginning of middle school. When Alex is gone John blames himself for not realizing earlier. But was it really all it seemed? ~~ John attends a therapist session to talk about Alex. That's where he realized it wasn't at all what everyone thought happened. He was going to find justice for Alex. One way or another.

When the quiet college student Alexander Hamilton arrives at Kings College, he automatically feels like something was gonna go completely wrong. Similar to most things in the young boy's life. Unfortunately, his suspicions were correct. He found out he had to share a dorm with none other than his enemy from high school, Thomas Jefferson. Thomas had bullied Alex countless times during their senior year of high school, (when Alex transferred,) and Alex hadn't gotten over it when he saw him again. I mean, who would be all cool with their roomie that made them cut themselves? But anyways, over time, Alex notices that Thomas isn't the basic bully that he seems, and there's a lot more to him that what he previously saw. And the more of Thomas he saw, the more he started to love him. Would Thomas return those feelings? Or would he make Alex's life a living hell for confessing his feelings? (DISCLAIMER!! I was 11 or 12 when I wrote this and had no grasp on the proper language and behavior for fanfic. I said a lot of inappropriate stuff in this book, and I have altered what I could in light of becoming older and recovering from the really awful experience that made me act out the way I did. Some parts are important to the story, so I can't erase them. But I will put trigger warnings for almost smut and self-h*rm. And maybe some stereotypes and insensitive language, as I was uneducated about lgbtq and how it can be appropriately represented by a straight woman. To anyone I've made uneasy in any way, I'm sorry. I was a real annoying and inappropriate writer. I've been a lot more friendly about my books since this, and my family and friends have helped me see how mentally messed up I was when I was writing this. I feel sick to my stomach thinking I once wrote like this and conducted myself in this manner. Please forgive me. I've learned a lot in the four years since I wrote this. Ily all, and happy reading <3)