***Previously Wattpad Featured Story*** Meet your run-of-the-mill protagonist: Main Character. In this fantasy (spoof) of an epic adventure, Main embarks on a quest to conquer the world, guided only by the words of a drunkard, and a bolt of red lightning. It soon becomes clear that the twelve-foot troll travelling with him is only the start of his increasingly bizarre list of sidekicks. Rising to villainy is harder than it looks, Main realizes; plot twists give him vertigo, and hard work is migraine-inducing. But still, there's a world to conquer, fangirls to run from, and love to fall slave to. What could possibly go wrong? COMPLETED

Barney Conroy is an average guy trying to live an average life. He's just not as good at it as the rest of us. Each chapter of 'The Chronicles of Barnia' captures a particular episode in Barney's struggle to be socially acceptable. They can be read in any order. Barney's adventures continue in a full length novel right here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01CSIFKQK Enjoy! Guy

*****WATTYS 2015 WINNER!***** WATTPAD STAFF PICK (9/7/15) In the end, the robots win. But you already knew that. "Everyone Died + My iPhone Stopped Working" is a collection of short interviews with some of the survivors. People who have tremendous insight into the rise of Artificially Intelligent machines or, more often, don't. Why did the robots rise up? What did they want? Why couldn't they be stopped? Can they be stopped now? Is humanity doomed? And what the f--k is going on with the squirrels? You will get the answers to all of these questions. Or some of these questions. Or none of these questions. We'll see. I will be updating this once a week until I run out of stuff that I find funny. Then I'm done. Cover art courtesy of the hilarious and ridiculously talented Dave Pressler. (http://www.davepresslerart.com)

Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

I started these in my Wattpad 101 as a joke chapter that showcases all the cliches among various genres. I started with Fan Fiction, moved on to Fantasy and Sci Fi... and to be honest, I like writing these funny "shorts". I had a lot of ideas and not all of them really fit as Wattpad 101 chapters, so I decided to turn all of these one-off chapters in into a compendium of short satires. They can get a pretty lowbrow so we'll see how long before the Mature rating gets added, so enjoy!