Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

Percy has been through a lot, being kidnapped, having his memory wiped, several battles, two wars. He does not need anything else to happen. Too bad the wizards, which are real apparently (!?), didn't get the memo. Well, you know the phrase, when in Rome. (Heh, Rome, get it?) (After BoO and during Order of the Phoenix.) [I obviously am not Uncle Rick or JK Rowling.] {Anyone else got that Hufflepuff Pride?}

An ordinary accident leaves Peter Parker an orphan once again. The worst part was nothing could have prevented it, Aunt May was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Little did Peter know that he had a godfather, and Peter was very shocked to find Tony FREAKING Stark, of all people, was filling out his adoption paper. Even more so to find out Tony already knew he was the web slinging Spider-Man... though that still only left one problem. Tony had no idea Peter was a wizard. OR Peter's just the average student wizard who loses his last remaining family member. Oddly enough his #1 no-maj idol turns out to be his godfather and soon circumstances bring him to Hogwarts along with the bizarre twist of fate that lead his name being placed in the goblet of fire. Outrage rang out through the schools as not one, but two underage wizards were picked to represent Hogwarts in the Triwizard Tournaments. Peter never expected to be held in the lime light next to the famous 'Boy Who Lived.' Tony was only just getting used to the fact that his adopted spider-son was a wizard, now he had new worries for the kid as he participated in the deadly challenges of the tournament.