mr clean is your sugar daddy

(PLEASE READ THE LAST CHAPTER!!!) I applied to be Elon Musk's personal assistant. (Meaning I would write stuff down and stuff) He hired me, and I was excited. Ever since I was 16 I have admired this man. He's so smart, and I want his Big Brain to fill me with knowledge. Throughout my new career, I get closer and closer to Mr. Musk. So close, in fact, that I smell his musky musk everyday. Thank you, Elon, very cool.

* this is just gonna be crazy so prepare yourselves * "it's simple; he's lonely. he needs a friend. and i'm going to be his friend." "she came along, and then i wasn't afraid of losing them; i was afraid of losing her TO them." (((just a note: to all those asking if this is a joke, it was, originally. but I wrote it in such a way that it's hard to tell whether it's a joke or not. so it's up to you!! either way, I hope you enjoy because I worked hard on this!!))) edit: why the fuck did i write this edit 2: the ONLY reason i'm leaving this story up is because other people seem to like it. but reading it now makes me want to peel my own skin off. edit 3: i wrote this in middle school. i am now in university. and the comments just keep coming. something about this just. means a lot to me, despite the fact that this is a hot pile of steaming garbage. it's cute.