❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer reviews? How many stars out of five?❞ ❝What are yo- oh my god, I'm going to fucking kill Marie.❞ (alternatively called: a lot of people shit with pens) written in dialogue // cover by xhemmingshugsx

Sick of cliché Wattpad books? Then this isn't the book for you. We take every single over-used plot, character and trope on Wattpad - from player-meets-nerd to my-boyfriend-is-a-vampire - and mash it all into one, awful, hilarious parody. NOTE: This is a parody. Characters have not been created to mock a race/nationality/sexuality, they have been created to lightly poke fun at the way certain teen fiction writers reduce them into crude stereotypes. Thanks for helping this pile of junk get to #1 in Humor!

"H-Huh?!" I screamed, clutching my towel tightly. "Y-Your the man I hit with my car earlier! How did you get in here?! I thought I locked all the doors and windows!" The same man from earlier, with jet black hair and glowing blue eyes, simply sat in my bathtub, completely naked might I add, and smirked at me with what one might describe as a confident and smug gaze. "You never told me what you wanted by the way." He snapped his fingers and a glass of wine suddenly appeared in his hand before I could even blink my eyes. "That's because I don't want anything! Now get out of my bathtub! No scratch that, get out of my house!" I could feel my cheeks burn as I backed away slightly. But before I could turn around and run out of my bathroom, he snapped his fingers and the door slammed closed. "Alright, if you aren't going to tell me what you want, then I shall tell you what I want." He stood up abruptly, and I could feel my eyes widen as I saw- [ Entire description in next chapter ;) ]

Dear Reader, It hadn't hit me right away, many things, but especially the fact that I was about to turn twenty years old. It was as if it was just yesterday that I was learning how to make a peanut butter sandwiches, tie my shoes, and draw endlessly with fat crayons--which I thoroughly believed to be a masterpiece. It had to be yesterday, when I was befriending any new person that I met with a dazzling smile. No, those were the years that I was numb--masked from the world and blissfully unaware of the dangers and lingering dark edges of the Chicago city. Life moves fast; terrifyingly fast for some, especially those who try and anchor down each and every day of their existence. For others, it moves drearily slow. I use to be numb, I use to be unaware of the shadows deep within the corners of the earth, the watchful figures around me. I use to draw scribbles, struggle to tie my shoes, and fail at doing the simple things, like tying shoes. I use to make friends with anyone I met and kept that friendship over a promise. I use to do a lot of things, actually. But that was when life was a whole lot simpler, safer, and perfect. That was before I knew about Death. That was before he became my frenemy. Forever and always, Faith Williams *** MY WRITING PAGE! Please join! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Kat-aka-katrocks247-from-Wattpad/208740202517075

(Bfflad- Best friends for life and death) Dear Reader, Let's start at the beginning shall we? I died. Oh no, not one of these stories again where someone angelic and heroic saves the damsel in distress. If only I was that lucky. My heart stopped beating. My lungs stopped working, my soul began to lift away... And then I was saved by a beautiful man with a kind heart and sparkles sprinkled around his head in a golden halo. A cunning, dazzling smile etched his angled features and his hair lay perfectly on his head like...black, sinful layers of pure cynical distrusting evil. Evil that was just waiting to onset a innocent girl as myself and allow her a short amount of time of happiness, and then finish her off when she became older. I'll give you a hint. The beginning of that description was slightly exaggerated. The Angel of Death. One of the only creatures known that was capable of settling the boundaries of heaven on earth. The only creature capable of making one of the Devil's darkest deals to my loving mother; a second chance for her daughter. This comes with consequences of course. Everything you know about Death is wrong. Death is not natural, Death is not normal, Death is not doleful, and Death is far from mercenary. Death blends into the shadows like coal against the most atramentous sky. Death walks the earth with his cursed, monstrous and exotic features, his enticing voice and betraying alluring eyes. Death deceives, scratches, and plays with your mind, until you slowly and painfully loose your grip on reality. He'll make you believe he's a different person, that there's a sliver hope for him. Hope for you. Death is close. Forever and always, Faith Williams ************ DIMBFF FAN CLUB ON FACEBOOK: http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.1605057011183.80718.1378871754&type=1#!/groups/308207282529485/ **** MY WRITING PAGE! Please join! http://www.facebook.com/pages/Kat-aka-katrocks247-from-Wattpad/208740202517075

I found this book. It's for dead people. Yeah. I'm a little worried. A short story about what really happens when you die. A Wattpad 'Featured List' story and winner of the 'HQ Love Award' in the 2014 Wattys! I hope you enjoy it! If you do, please check out my new short story collection for Kindle, 'The Good Death Guide and Other Tales', featuring extra passages from the Good Death Guide! http://www.amazon.com/Good-Death-Guide-Other-Tales-ebook/dp/B00SPRQY4Q

Isyss Dulay has been bestfriends and next door neighbors with Courtney King all her life. But along with Courtney comes her twin brother Cory, who happens to be the school's number one hottie. But Isyss doesn't like Cory and she's probably the only girl in school who doesn't; minus Courtney of course. Due to a little prank played in class one day, Isyss and Cory find themselves in a 'Im better than you' game. This game consist of sexual teasing, flirting, and taunting. Who will be victorious, leaving the guilty party lovestruck.... [the sequel to this book is called "Sooner or Later...You'll Want Me Again."

Leah Preston was a normal 17 year old girl, until she wakes up and finds herself staring at her own lifeless body. She has no idea what happened to her or how she died, and the only person who can see her is her sworn enemy Jared. Neither of them have a choice, they must put their differences aside in order to find out what really happened to Leah and how she died, or better yet, who killed her, while at the same time fighting each other and the feelings they are beginning to develop. ©makeandoffer

Charlie is just a normal sassy teenager, but who knew that walking around the town that she's lived in her whole life could get her kidnapped? Does anyone care? What will happen to her?

A new female teacher arrives at a high school, she meets 5 attractive boys in 5 of her new classes she'll teach. Number 1: The Naughty Student, Harry Styles in her English class. Number 2: The Good Student, Liam Payne in her History class. Number 3: The Wild Student, Louis Tomlinson in her Math class. Number 4: The Hungry Student, Niall Horan in her Music class. Number 5: The Mysterious Student, Zayn Malik in her Art class. And all of them together is in her homeroom class!! How will the new female teacher survive their madness?! (The Cover is made by my BFF/SIS: @VasHappeninOneD)